As I cleaned up my pigsty of an apartment, I realized something; I was a new man. There was an extra hop in my step as I raced around cleaning and getting ready to go out. Jack was back in town and he had stopped by just two hours ago and somehow pulled me out of a funk that I never thought I would come back from. On top of that, I am in love. The best part about that was, I knew, now, that Stacy loved me too. The only thing that I had to do now was go get her.
As the afternoon progressed, I found myself getting more and more nervous. It had been two weeks since I had talked to Stacy, so it was definitely going to be awkward. However, the main reason I was nervous was that I had absolutely no idea what I was going to say to her. Hopefully, it wouldn’t have to be much.
No one knew yet that I was coming. I received a text from Jack earlier saying that everyone was going to meet at his place and that they would be there for a while, so I decided to surprise them.
Joel stood in front of his bathroom mirror with a can of shaving cream and his razor, staring at his beard. He tilted his head back and leaned it to the right and then to the left, admiring his ability to grow such an impressive beard in just two weeks. He lowered his head and sat his razor on the counter. He began to run his fingers through his beard, contemplating whether or not to shave it.
“I do look good,” said Joel, continuing to rub his beard, “but it is itchy.”
After another few minutes of gazing admirably, Joel made the tough decision to shave his beard.
“Goodbye old friend,” said Joel, spraying shaving cream into his hand. “It has been a good run... well, not really good, but it has been a run nonetheless. Perhaps our paths will cross again someday.”
After shaving and having a moment of silence for his fallen friend, Joel finished getting ready and exited his now clean apartment, and headed down to Jack’s.
As fate would have it, I arrived at Jack’s apartment the exact same time that Stacy did. This was even more of a surprise considering the fact that John told me earlier that Lauren and Stacy were going to a movie tonight. Focus Joel! Stacy is right in front of you and all you can think about is John. Say something!
“H-hey, Stacy,” said Joel, smiling awkwardly.
“Hi,” replied Stacy, stopping a few steps away from Jack’s door.
Wow, this is even more awkward than I had expected.
Both Stacy and Joel started to say something, but stopped when seeing that the other person was going to say something. They repeated this process three times before laughing.
“Go ahead,” said Stacy.
“I’m really sorry that I haven’t called you back,” said Joel.
“It’s okay,” replied Stacy.
“Really?” asked Joel.
Stacy smiled while walking up to Joel. She stopped if front of him and raised herself up onto her tip-toes. She leaned in and kissed Joel, who welcomed the unexpected surprise.
It was really happening; Stacy and I were actually kissing! I kept waiting for something to ruin the moment like myself waking up, but nothing like that happened. This was for real. As Stacy’s soft lips were pressed against mine, I drifted away. I was completely lost in the moment. I was not one bit let down. It was everything that I though it would be and more.
After relinquishing the kiss, Stacy took a step back from Joel and looked into his eyes. “Yes, Joel,” she said. “It is okay.”
And at that point, all of my worry melted away. Everything was truly ok. I guess when you love someone, it is easy to forgive them.
“Now what do we do?” asked Joel.
“Well, we could go inside,” said Stacy, “or we could just hang out here in the hall.”
Joel smiled and nodded. “Well played,” he said. “I kind of like it out here though.”
“Oh really?” asked Stacy, who smiled and leaned in to kiss Joel.
After the two of them kissed again, they turned and headed into Jack’s apartment. Upon entering everyone but the two of them had already arrived. They turned to greet Stacy, who they expected, and were shocked to see their long lost friend, Joel.
I was actually surprised at the way that my friends greeted me. They acted as if I had been shipwrecked on a deserted island for the past ten years. I guess it had been a long time and part of the surprise might have been that Stacy and I walked in the door hand-in-hand.
“So,” said John, pulling Joel away from Stacy and smiling wryly, “what’s up?”
“Very funny,” said Joel. “I thought they were going to a movie?”
“Yeah, well,” said John.
“You were trying to get me in the same room as Stacy, weren’t you?” asked Joel.
John nodded like a child that had been caught sneaking desert before dinner.
“You, my friend, are an ass,” said Joel. “Trying to set me up like that.”
“That is hardly fair.” said John. “Look at you two! It would have worked out fine.”
“Yeah, yeah,” said Joel, “just get me a beer.”
As the night continued, I met Rachel, Jack’s girlfriend, who was a really cool girl. A little quiet at first, but she warmed up to us and fit right in. On a side note: her and I clicked really well. Of course, Dustin was there. I managed to keep my distance, though, as he did the same. Anyway, things between Stacy and myself were great, although at certain points during the night, she acted as though something was bothering her. Overall, the night was off to a great start. Little did I know, that was about to change. It happened when we went to Shenanigans.
When the group of nine arrived at Shenanigans, they paid and entered. Stacy, Lauren, Tiffany, and Rachel headed for the dance floor, while Joel, John, Jack, Brian, and Dustin made their way to the bar. Upon reaching the bar, they ordered a round of shots to toast Jack’s return.
“Here’s to Jack,” said Dustin, lifting his shot glass into the air.
“And to Joel coming out of his cocoon,” added John sarcastically.
“Let’s not make this about me,” said Joel,
“Good, because it isn’t,” said Dustin.
Sometimes it is better to ignore ignorant people and their ignorant comments. However, this is not one of those times...
“And here is to the return of Dustin’s home,” said Joel.
“What?” asked Dustin, looking at Joel with a confused look, as did everyone else.
“Yeah, to you,” said Joel, “Jack has returned and now you can crawl right back up into his-“
“Okay, okay,” said Jack. “That is enough.”
Dustin glowered at Joel and Joel smiled at Dustin as John and Brian snickered, trying to hold back their laughs.
“To Jack,” said Brian after a moment, breaking the tension-filled silence.
The five of them took their shots and placed their shot glasses on the bar.
“Rachel seems cool,” said Joel to Jack.
“Yeah," answered Jack mundanely, “I guess.”
“You guess?” asked Joel.
“I don’t know,” said Jack. “I’m starting to think that her moving here was not a good idea.”
“You two have only been back for one day,” said Joel.
“I know,” said Jack, “but it just does not feel right.”
“Well, give it some time,” said Joel.
“Yeah, I guess,” said Jack.
I do not know what is wrong with Jack. He has-from what I can tell-a great girl, who he got to move down here, and is already second-guessing himself? That’s not right, but this is not the time or place to discuss it, so I let it go for now.
Shortly thereafter, Dustin and Jack made their way onto the dance floor to dance, leaving Joel, John, and Brian at the bar.
“That was sweet,” said John, "what you said to Dustin."
“Yeah,” said Brian, “the look on his face was priceless.”
“Glad I could provide you with some entertainment,” said Joel with a smirk.
“I’m going to go dance,” said Brian. He then made his way through the crowd toward his friends’ current position.
“So, I guess you and Stacy are official?” asked John of Joel.
“I wouldn’t necessarily say that,” said Joel. “Not yet at least. I want to take it slow with her.”
“That’s the last thing I expected to hear you say,” said John, a little surprised.
“Yeah,” said Joel, “me too.” Joel then looked at John with a sincerity in his eyes. “It’s just that I have waited so long to be with her, that I just want everything to be perfect. I don’t want to rush anything and mess it up.”
John smiled and let a slight laugh escape him.
“What?” asked Joel. “You think that is funny?”
John shook his head. “That’s not it.”
“Then what is it?” asked Joel, becoming impatient.
“I know everything that happens with you and Stacy will be fine,” said John, “because I see the seriousness in your face when you talk about her. It is the same thing when she talks about you. What you two have; it’s the real thing.”
Joel smiled. “Thanks man. Let’s get a drink.”
“Finally,” said John. “I thought you were going to try and hug me or something.”
Joel rolled his eyes and started toward the bar. It was not long after, that Stacy and Tiffany came over to them from the dance floor.
“You two are being antisocial,” said Tiffany, “so we thought we would come drag you out onto the dance floor.”
“I would,” said John facetiously, “but my leg kinda hurts and I have a beer and I don’t want to spill it on anyone.”
“You’re dancing,” said Tiffany. “Now come on!”
“Fine,” said John unenthusiastically, allowing Tiffany to pull him onto the dance floor.
After a laugh, Stacy looked up at Joel. “Hi,” she said with a smile.
“Hey,” said Joel, who found himself getting lost in Stacy’s eyes like he always had.
Wait a minute. I can finally tell her how beautiful she is without the fear of making things awkward.
“What is it?” asked Stacy, seeing that Joel was on the verge of saying something.
“I have always wanted to tell you something,” said Joel.
“Yes?” asked Stacy,
“You have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen,” said Joel. “I get lost in them.”
Stacy smiled, but then looked down as if she had something on her mind.
“You okay?” asked Joel.
“Joel,” said Stacy, “I’m leaving.”
This caught Joel by surprise, but he went with it. “Okay,” he said. “Let me pay my tab and I will go with you.”
“No, Joel,” said Stacy, looking up at him with tears in her eyes.
And once again, as fate would have it, just as everything had become right with the world, did it come crashing down all around me with Stacy’s next few words.
“I am leaving Charlotte.”
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
Episode 19: Cruise Control
Over the next two weeks, everything ran together. I went through the motions like a mindless zombie. I went to work and then straight home, transitioning from one activity to another without even realizing it. No Stratler’s. No anything. Everything was a blur. It was almost as if I was set on cruise control. My friends would call me and ask me to go out and do things, but I made excuse after excuse as to why I could not go with them. I wanted to, but I just could not gather the will to do so. I was still in...shock I guess is the best word to describe my current state. Yeah, I was in shock. Besides, I did not want to take the chance of seeing her.
Stacy had tried to call me a hand full of times over the last two weeks, but when she did, I hit the ignore button on my phone. I couldn’t even begin to think about what she had done to me without beginning to grow angry. I cannot decide it is just me or that it is not right what Stacy did to me. Maybe I was overreacting. I mean, the girl that I have been in love with since we were kids felt the same was about me and all I could do was be angry at her. I even attempted to call her a few times, but I found myself unable to hit the call button. Every time I tried, I would start to think about how heartbroken I was the times I tried to confess my love for her and she shot me down knowing full well that she felt the same way. Then anger would set back in.
You just don’t do that to someone, especially someone that you supposedly love.
It was early in the evening on Friday when John and Tiffany arrived at Joel’s apartment building. Already knowing the code for the front door, John keyed it in and pulled the door open, allowing Tiffany to traverse the doorway first. The pair walked across the lobby and entered the elevator, riding it up to Joel’s floor.
“How is he doing?” asked Tiffany of John.
“He sounds about the same,” replied John, watching the lights above the door light up as the elevator continued its ascent, “lost.”
“Poor thing,” said Tiffany, shaking her head.
Upon stopping, and the elevator bell ringing, the two doors slid apart and John and Tiffany exited, walking down the hall to Joel’s door. When the two of them had reached Joel’s door, John knocked. No answer. John waited a few moments and then knocked again; still no answer.
“Well, I know he is here,” said John, looking over at Tiffany with a confused look on his face. “I just talked to him.”
“Maybe he stepped out,” replied Tiffany.
“No,” said John, “he said he wasn’t going anywhere.”
Tiffany returned John’s confused look and reached out, grabbing the doorknob. She turned it and much to the delight of both of them, the door was unlocked. Pushing the door open, John led Tiffany in the light-deprived apartment.
The only light in the apartment was the few rays of the sun that snuck in through the closed blinds. Upon flipping the light switch, John and Tiffany found that Joel’s apartment was a mess. There were clothes lying all over the floor along with empty beer cans and pizza boxes. In the kitchen, a full bag of trash sat next to an overflowing trash can. Dirty dishes filled the sink and the surrounding counter.
“Joel?” asked John as he crept into the living room while looking around and stepping over the mess on the floor.
John and Tiffany’s attention was then quickly drawn toward the couch, in which a bundle of blankets was piled, as they heard a groan. The two of them furrowed their brows as the pile of blankets began to move. A hand, then an arm emerged from beneath the blankets, reaching upward as if it had been buried for days. The arm swung toward the front of the couch, knocking away enough of the blankets to uncover Joel’s torso. Rubbing his eyes, Joel opened them to see his two friends standing in his living room.
“Hey guys,” said Joel as he sat up.
“Good Lord,” said John upon seeing Joel.
Joel had obviously not shaved in a while as he had accrued a pretty thick beard in the process.
“You look like Grizzly Adams,” said John.
Joel was confused for a moment before realizing that John had not seen him in his current state. “Oh yeah,” he said, reaching up and rubbing his beard. “You like it?”
“No, not really,” replied John, who immediately winced as Tiffany’s hand flew over and struck his shoulder. “What?” he asked, looking down at Tiffany, “He asked.”
Tiffany rolled her eyes as she looked at Joel; pity had a stronghold on her face. “How are you doing, Joel?” she asked.
“Same ole, same ole,” replied Joel as he laid back down.
“Nice place,” said John sarcastically as he kicked a pizza box from in front of his feet.
“Be nice,” said Tiffany as she knelt down and began to pick up things off of the floor. She then went into the kitchen and opened a cabinet door located under the sink and grabbed a garbage bag. She dropped the few items she had in her hands into the bag, then began to pick up more.
“You don’t have to do that,” said Joel.
“Well somebody needs to,” said John.
“I was going to get it,” replied Joel. “What time is it?”
“Seven-thirty,” answered Tiffany.
John walked over to the couch and sat down on Joel’s legs, forcing him to sit up. “We are going out tonight and you are coming,” he said.
“Who’s we?” asked Joel, considering the invitation.
“You, me, Tiffany, and Brian,” answered John.
“Where’s-,” started Joel before being interrupted by John.
“Stacy and Lauren are going to a movie.”
“We aren’t taking no for an answer,” said Tiffany, who was loading the dishwasher.
“That’s right,” said John. “So that means that you are coming.”
Joel looked over at Tiffany and then back at John, who both knew that he was going to agree and that they were going to pull him out of his funk, but then Joel said something completely different. “No thanks.”
It was nice of them to come over and check on me, but I just wasn’t ready to go out.
“Oh, come on!” said John emphatically. “Are you just going to lie around and mope for the rest of your life!?”
Joel looked over at John and shrugged his shoulders.
“Fine,” said John angrily. “Come on Tiffany, we are leaving.”
John got up off of the couch and exited Joel’s apartment. Tiffany finished loading the dishwasher and turned it on. She walked toward the door, but stopped before reaching it and turned. “Bye Joel,” she said. She then gave Joel a sympathetic smile before turning and leaving, closing the door behind her.
Joel grimaced as he looked at the door and nodded.
I did not blame John for being angry. I guess I would be frustrated too. Now I feel bad. All they were trying to do was help. I guess you can’t help someone who doesn’t want it. Then it hit me; when did I become that type of person? Realizing that should have made me get up off of that couch and do something about it, but all it did was add to my misery. So, I did what I had been doing for the last two weeks; I got up, locked the door, got a beer, sat back down on the couch, turned the tv on, and drank myself to sleep.
* * *
Early on Saturday afternoon, Joel was awakened by a pounding on his door. He pushed through his cocoon of blankets and made his way to his feet. Stumbling over to the door, he turned the deadbolt and swung the door open. A surprised look came over his face when he saw who it was standing there.
“Jack?” he asked as he stood there wide-eyed.
Jack smiled and shrugged, holding his hands out to his side with his palms upward. “The one and only.”
John reached out and embraced his friend. “When did you get back?” he asked, letting go of Jack and taking a step back.
“Late last night,” answered Jack. He then followed Joel into his apartment. “Have you turned against cleaning?” he asked, looking around at Joel’s mess.
“It’s, uh, been a long couple of weeks,” said Joel with a sigh.
“You missed me so much that you fell into a depression?” joked Jack. “I don’t know what to say. It means a lot to me that you missed me that much.”
Joel let a slight chuckle escape him. “Yeah, something like that,” he said as he sat down on his couch.
“Actually,” said Jack, “Brian filled me in on what has been going on since I left.”
Joel said nothing. Instead, he just pressed his lips together, forming a straight line, and nodded. Before Jack could say anything else, Joel said, “So they sent you in to save the day.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “I’m glad that you stopped by and I’m definitely glad that you are back, but I do not need to be saved, Jack.”
“I know,” said Jack, “but I also know that this isn’t you. You have never been the one to throw in the towel just because of one setback, especially when it comes to Stacy.”
“Thanks for stopping by, Jack,” said Joel.
“Alright, I get it,” said Jack. “You want to be alone.”
“Bingo,” replied Joel.
“Ok,” said Jack. “Well, let me know when you are ready to go out because there is someone that I want you to meet.”
Joel looked at Jack curiously.
“Remember the girl I told you about from Michigan?” asked Jack.
Joel nodded.
“Well, she decided to move here,” said Jack. “She is staying with me until she can find a place.”
“Really?” asked Joel.
“Yeah,” answered Jack. “She is downstairs taking a nap before we go out tonight. I wanted everyone to meet her, so if you want to come, just let me know.”
Joel nodded as Jack turned and headed for the door. Just before Jack exited, Joel stopped him by saying, “I’ll be there.”
Jack turned and smiled. “Good,” he said before leaving, closing the door behind him.
It was right then that I knew that I was going to come out of this. Jack was right; I’m not a quitter and this isn’t me. I have been through this before, but the only difference this time was that I now I know how Stacy feels about me. It is time to put everything aside and finally be with her. I was not sure what the rest of the night held in store for me, but I was sure about one thing... it was time to go get Stacy.
Stacy had tried to call me a hand full of times over the last two weeks, but when she did, I hit the ignore button on my phone. I couldn’t even begin to think about what she had done to me without beginning to grow angry. I cannot decide it is just me or that it is not right what Stacy did to me. Maybe I was overreacting. I mean, the girl that I have been in love with since we were kids felt the same was about me and all I could do was be angry at her. I even attempted to call her a few times, but I found myself unable to hit the call button. Every time I tried, I would start to think about how heartbroken I was the times I tried to confess my love for her and she shot me down knowing full well that she felt the same way. Then anger would set back in.
You just don’t do that to someone, especially someone that you supposedly love.
It was early in the evening on Friday when John and Tiffany arrived at Joel’s apartment building. Already knowing the code for the front door, John keyed it in and pulled the door open, allowing Tiffany to traverse the doorway first. The pair walked across the lobby and entered the elevator, riding it up to Joel’s floor.
“How is he doing?” asked Tiffany of John.
“He sounds about the same,” replied John, watching the lights above the door light up as the elevator continued its ascent, “lost.”
“Poor thing,” said Tiffany, shaking her head.
Upon stopping, and the elevator bell ringing, the two doors slid apart and John and Tiffany exited, walking down the hall to Joel’s door. When the two of them had reached Joel’s door, John knocked. No answer. John waited a few moments and then knocked again; still no answer.
“Well, I know he is here,” said John, looking over at Tiffany with a confused look on his face. “I just talked to him.”
“Maybe he stepped out,” replied Tiffany.
“No,” said John, “he said he wasn’t going anywhere.”
Tiffany returned John’s confused look and reached out, grabbing the doorknob. She turned it and much to the delight of both of them, the door was unlocked. Pushing the door open, John led Tiffany in the light-deprived apartment.
The only light in the apartment was the few rays of the sun that snuck in through the closed blinds. Upon flipping the light switch, John and Tiffany found that Joel’s apartment was a mess. There were clothes lying all over the floor along with empty beer cans and pizza boxes. In the kitchen, a full bag of trash sat next to an overflowing trash can. Dirty dishes filled the sink and the surrounding counter.
“Joel?” asked John as he crept into the living room while looking around and stepping over the mess on the floor.
John and Tiffany’s attention was then quickly drawn toward the couch, in which a bundle of blankets was piled, as they heard a groan. The two of them furrowed their brows as the pile of blankets began to move. A hand, then an arm emerged from beneath the blankets, reaching upward as if it had been buried for days. The arm swung toward the front of the couch, knocking away enough of the blankets to uncover Joel’s torso. Rubbing his eyes, Joel opened them to see his two friends standing in his living room.
“Hey guys,” said Joel as he sat up.
“Good Lord,” said John upon seeing Joel.
Joel had obviously not shaved in a while as he had accrued a pretty thick beard in the process.
“You look like Grizzly Adams,” said John.
Joel was confused for a moment before realizing that John had not seen him in his current state. “Oh yeah,” he said, reaching up and rubbing his beard. “You like it?”
“No, not really,” replied John, who immediately winced as Tiffany’s hand flew over and struck his shoulder. “What?” he asked, looking down at Tiffany, “He asked.”
Tiffany rolled her eyes as she looked at Joel; pity had a stronghold on her face. “How are you doing, Joel?” she asked.
“Same ole, same ole,” replied Joel as he laid back down.
“Nice place,” said John sarcastically as he kicked a pizza box from in front of his feet.
“Be nice,” said Tiffany as she knelt down and began to pick up things off of the floor. She then went into the kitchen and opened a cabinet door located under the sink and grabbed a garbage bag. She dropped the few items she had in her hands into the bag, then began to pick up more.
“You don’t have to do that,” said Joel.
“Well somebody needs to,” said John.
“I was going to get it,” replied Joel. “What time is it?”
“Seven-thirty,” answered Tiffany.
John walked over to the couch and sat down on Joel’s legs, forcing him to sit up. “We are going out tonight and you are coming,” he said.
“Who’s we?” asked Joel, considering the invitation.
“You, me, Tiffany, and Brian,” answered John.
“Where’s-,” started Joel before being interrupted by John.
“Stacy and Lauren are going to a movie.”
“We aren’t taking no for an answer,” said Tiffany, who was loading the dishwasher.
“That’s right,” said John. “So that means that you are coming.”
Joel looked over at Tiffany and then back at John, who both knew that he was going to agree and that they were going to pull him out of his funk, but then Joel said something completely different. “No thanks.”
It was nice of them to come over and check on me, but I just wasn’t ready to go out.
“Oh, come on!” said John emphatically. “Are you just going to lie around and mope for the rest of your life!?”
Joel looked over at John and shrugged his shoulders.
“Fine,” said John angrily. “Come on Tiffany, we are leaving.”
John got up off of the couch and exited Joel’s apartment. Tiffany finished loading the dishwasher and turned it on. She walked toward the door, but stopped before reaching it and turned. “Bye Joel,” she said. She then gave Joel a sympathetic smile before turning and leaving, closing the door behind her.
Joel grimaced as he looked at the door and nodded.
I did not blame John for being angry. I guess I would be frustrated too. Now I feel bad. All they were trying to do was help. I guess you can’t help someone who doesn’t want it. Then it hit me; when did I become that type of person? Realizing that should have made me get up off of that couch and do something about it, but all it did was add to my misery. So, I did what I had been doing for the last two weeks; I got up, locked the door, got a beer, sat back down on the couch, turned the tv on, and drank myself to sleep.
* * *
Early on Saturday afternoon, Joel was awakened by a pounding on his door. He pushed through his cocoon of blankets and made his way to his feet. Stumbling over to the door, he turned the deadbolt and swung the door open. A surprised look came over his face when he saw who it was standing there.
“Jack?” he asked as he stood there wide-eyed.
Jack smiled and shrugged, holding his hands out to his side with his palms upward. “The one and only.”
John reached out and embraced his friend. “When did you get back?” he asked, letting go of Jack and taking a step back.
“Late last night,” answered Jack. He then followed Joel into his apartment. “Have you turned against cleaning?” he asked, looking around at Joel’s mess.
“It’s, uh, been a long couple of weeks,” said Joel with a sigh.
“You missed me so much that you fell into a depression?” joked Jack. “I don’t know what to say. It means a lot to me that you missed me that much.”
Joel let a slight chuckle escape him. “Yeah, something like that,” he said as he sat down on his couch.
“Actually,” said Jack, “Brian filled me in on what has been going on since I left.”
Joel said nothing. Instead, he just pressed his lips together, forming a straight line, and nodded. Before Jack could say anything else, Joel said, “So they sent you in to save the day.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “I’m glad that you stopped by and I’m definitely glad that you are back, but I do not need to be saved, Jack.”
“I know,” said Jack, “but I also know that this isn’t you. You have never been the one to throw in the towel just because of one setback, especially when it comes to Stacy.”
“Thanks for stopping by, Jack,” said Joel.
“Alright, I get it,” said Jack. “You want to be alone.”
“Bingo,” replied Joel.
“Ok,” said Jack. “Well, let me know when you are ready to go out because there is someone that I want you to meet.”
Joel looked at Jack curiously.
“Remember the girl I told you about from Michigan?” asked Jack.
Joel nodded.
“Well, she decided to move here,” said Jack. “She is staying with me until she can find a place.”
“Really?” asked Joel.
“Yeah,” answered Jack. “She is downstairs taking a nap before we go out tonight. I wanted everyone to meet her, so if you want to come, just let me know.”
Joel nodded as Jack turned and headed for the door. Just before Jack exited, Joel stopped him by saying, “I’ll be there.”
Jack turned and smiled. “Good,” he said before leaving, closing the door behind him.
It was right then that I knew that I was going to come out of this. Jack was right; I’m not a quitter and this isn’t me. I have been through this before, but the only difference this time was that I now I know how Stacy feels about me. It is time to put everything aside and finally be with her. I was not sure what the rest of the night held in store for me, but I was sure about one thing... it was time to go get Stacy.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Episode 18: Numb
Well it has been two weeks since the incident with Joel and Dustin at Stanky’s and Joel has pretty much stuck to his word. It has actually worked out really well for the rest of us because when Joel is with us, Dustin does not come around. That, and Dustin has been working a lot lately, so he hasn’t been joining us on our nightly trips to Stratler’s.
I think that Brian has enjoyed being away from Dustin the most. The poor guy has to live with Dustin, so he automatically has the sympathy of everyone. Lately though, he has been on cloud nine and very appreciative to Joel, though Joel plays it off like it isn’t that big of a deal. All in all, things have been great except for one thing.
Joel’s new girlfriend, Amber.
Joel and Amber have been out a few times over the last two weeks and judging by Joel, things are going good so far. He brought her to Stratler’s to meet us a few nights ago and as much as I wanted to like her, I just couldn’t. I couldn’t help it. She is with my guy. Hmph, I say my guy like I ever had him in the first place. Anyway, I just hope that it was not noticeable to Joel that I couldn’t stand Amber.
This weekend, we decided to go to our favorite comedy club, Chuckles. Apparently Brian accidently forgot to invite Dustin. And when I use the term accidently, I use it very lightly. It wasn’t the nicest of moves to make, but nobody seemed to mind.
As Joel was driving himself, Stacy, and John to pick up Tiffany at her apartment, John sat in the back while Stacy rode in the front. Joel was flipping through the radio stations while driving when a song caught John’s attention. Joel let the song play for a few seconds before changing the station.
“Hey,” said John, “go back a station.”
“Why?” asked Joel, being intentionally difficult.
“Just do it,” protested John. “I like that song.”
Joel furrowed his brow as he changed the station back and looked at John in his rear-view mirror. “This song?” he asked, almost disgusted at the thought.
“Yeah.” answered John.
“Dude, you do realize that you just made me turn it back to a Miley Cyrus song, do you not?” asked Joel.
“So,” answered John. “I like this song.”
“There are so many things wrong with that, I do not know where to begin,” said Joel, shaking his head. “I guess I should start with the fact that you are a guy.”
“What’s wrong with a guy liking this song?” asked John.
“Everything!” exclaimed Joel. “No self-respecting man listens to Miley Cyrus.” He then turned the station.
“Come on!” yelled John.
“No,” said Joel. “I will not sit idly by and let you do that to yourself.”
“I like that song,” said Stacy.
“It is ok for you to like that song,” responded Joel. “You are a girl.”
“Fair enough,” answered Stacy.
“Yes!” said Joel loudly. “You insisted, but I told you that it would wear off on you.”
Stacy was puzzled as she looked at Joel and asked, “What?”
“You just said ‘fair enough,’” answered Joel.
“No I didn’t,” said Stacy, thinking about her previous comments.
“John?” asked Joel.
“Yeah,” said John, not looking up from his text message, “you said it.”
“No!” said Stacy, slapping her knee playfully. “I swore that would never happen.”
“It was only a matter of time,” said Joel, smiling while nodding his head.
When the trio arrived at Tiffany’s apartment complex, John exited the vehicle and entered Tiffany’s building. Joel and Stacy sat in his Charger, awaiting the arrival of John and Tiffany.
I am not sure what came over me when John left Joel and myself alone in the car while going up to get Tiffany, but I became so bold in that moment. What I said next was probably-no, it was definitely a mistake.
“So,” asked Stacy, “you really like this Amber girl?
“Well, I haven’t known her very long, but she seems like a really cool girl,” said Joel.
“You think so?” asked Stacy.
“Yeah,” answered Joel. “Why? Did you get another impression?”
“You want my honest opinion?” asked Stacy.
“Yes,” responded Joel.
“I think you could do better,” said Stacy.
“Thanks,” said Joel, “but the girls aren’t exactly lining up at my door.”
“You will find the right girl,” said Stacy. “Who knows, she could be right under your nose.”
Oh no! What am I doing? He is going to see through this for sure! I cannot believe that I just said that!
“Yeah I guess,” said Joel.
“Any girl would be lucky to be with you,” said Stacy.
Shut up! What is wrong with you!? Why can’t you just stop talking!?
“If you say so,” said Joel, with a sigh.
“I do say so,” responded Stacy
It was then that I realized what I was doing. I was building my way to a confession of my love. Then, in what I feel was on purpose, Joel changed the subject.
“I hope the comedians are good tonight,” said Joel.
I grimaced in frustration, but I quickly hid it so that Joel would not notice. “Yeah,” said Stacy softly. “They usually are though.”
There was an awkward silence for a few minutes after Stacy’s comment, but then John returned along with Tiffany. When the two got into Joel’s Charger, they looked at each other as if they were entering a hostile environment. Tiffany leaned up and put her hand gently on Stacy’s right shoulder.
“Is everything ok, Stacy?” asked Tiffany.
“Yeah,” responded Stacy, obviously dejected.
Simultaneously, John leaned up and said, “You okay up there?”
Joel snapped out of his deep thought. “Uh, yeah,” he said. “Yeah. I am good.”
“We need to get going then,” said Stacy. “We don’t want to keep Brian and Lauren waiting.”Joel nodded and started the car, put it in drive, and pulled away from the curve.
When the four of them had reached Chuckles, Joel circled the parking lot once before finding a spot. He pulled in and the four of them exited the vehicle.
Stacy and Tiffany walked ahead as John held Joel back.
“Ok,” said Tiffany. “What happened?”
“Well, uh,” started Stacy, before pausing to sigh. “I have feelings for Joel and I have been trying to tell him, but it just goes wrong every time.”
“Oh,” said Tiffany, not sure what to say.
“It’s ok,” replied Stacy. “I am going to just have to live with the fact that it just wasn’t meant to be I guess.”
“Why don’t you just tell him how you feel?” asked Tiffany.
“It isn’t that easy,” answered Stacy.
“Trust me,” said Tiffany, giving Stacy a distinct look. “You need to tell him.”
Wait, is she trying to tell me that... I think she is!
“Are you sure?” asked Stacy.
“Just tell him,” said Tiffany with a wink.
It was at that point that Stacy walked over to Joel in the middle of the Chuckles parking lot.
“Joel,” said Stacy, walking up to him, “I need to talk to you.”
“Okay,” said Joel, looking over at John, who nodded and walked away.
Stacy watched John walk away, then turned back to Joel. “There is something that I need to tell you,” she said.
“What is it, Stacy?” asked Joel.
I was so nervous. My stomach was in knots. I could barely summon the words to speak. But then I thought about how I had to pretend that I did not have feelings for Joel for so long. It was that thought that made me come out with it.
“I cannot do this anymore, Joel,” said Stacy. “I am tired of hiding behind false feelings.” She paused and looked down, but not long enough for Joel to get a word in. Stacy then raised her head and her eyes met Joel’s. “I love you, Joel.”
I cannot believe it! I told him! Then it hit me, I actually told him. I anxiously awaited his response, but it was not what I had expected or hoped for.
“So at Shenanigans you knew that when I said I love you, I meant as more than a friend?” asked Joel.
“Yes,” answered Stacy. “I am sorr-” Before she could get her apology out, Joel interrupted.
“Then why did you say you loved me only as a friend?” asked Joel, who at this point was growing angry. Before Stacy could answer, Joel continued. “You do not know the heartache that I have gone through since then, Stacy. If you knew what I meant, then why did you do that to me?”
“Maybe I was scared,” said Stacy.
And that was the honest truth. I was scared that night and I panicked. Then Joel started gritting his teeth and looking around like he always did when he got mad.
“But I am telling you now, Joel,” said Stacy. “Why are you angry?”
Joel finally looked back at Stacy. “You have no idea what that did to me. I was devastated!” he shouted. He quickly regained control of himself and continued. “I have been torturing myself for thinking that there was more between us than what really was.”
Stacy, obviously regretful, looked down at the ground. “I am sorry, Joel.”
She looked up and watched Joel walk over to the rest of the group, who by this point, were paying attention. He asked if Brian could take John, Tiffany, and Stacy home, then walked over to his car, got in, and left.
The tears started streaming down my face uncontrollably as I watch Joel speed away. I didn’t now what to do or think. I was numb.
* * *
I think that Brian has enjoyed being away from Dustin the most. The poor guy has to live with Dustin, so he automatically has the sympathy of everyone. Lately though, he has been on cloud nine and very appreciative to Joel, though Joel plays it off like it isn’t that big of a deal. All in all, things have been great except for one thing.
Joel’s new girlfriend, Amber.
Joel and Amber have been out a few times over the last two weeks and judging by Joel, things are going good so far. He brought her to Stratler’s to meet us a few nights ago and as much as I wanted to like her, I just couldn’t. I couldn’t help it. She is with my guy. Hmph, I say my guy like I ever had him in the first place. Anyway, I just hope that it was not noticeable to Joel that I couldn’t stand Amber.
This weekend, we decided to go to our favorite comedy club, Chuckles. Apparently Brian accidently forgot to invite Dustin. And when I use the term accidently, I use it very lightly. It wasn’t the nicest of moves to make, but nobody seemed to mind.
As Joel was driving himself, Stacy, and John to pick up Tiffany at her apartment, John sat in the back while Stacy rode in the front. Joel was flipping through the radio stations while driving when a song caught John’s attention. Joel let the song play for a few seconds before changing the station.
“Hey,” said John, “go back a station.”
“Why?” asked Joel, being intentionally difficult.
“Just do it,” protested John. “I like that song.”
Joel furrowed his brow as he changed the station back and looked at John in his rear-view mirror. “This song?” he asked, almost disgusted at the thought.
“Yeah.” answered John.
“Dude, you do realize that you just made me turn it back to a Miley Cyrus song, do you not?” asked Joel.
“So,” answered John. “I like this song.”
“There are so many things wrong with that, I do not know where to begin,” said Joel, shaking his head. “I guess I should start with the fact that you are a guy.”
“What’s wrong with a guy liking this song?” asked John.
“Everything!” exclaimed Joel. “No self-respecting man listens to Miley Cyrus.” He then turned the station.
“Come on!” yelled John.
“No,” said Joel. “I will not sit idly by and let you do that to yourself.”
“I like that song,” said Stacy.
“It is ok for you to like that song,” responded Joel. “You are a girl.”
“Fair enough,” answered Stacy.
“Yes!” said Joel loudly. “You insisted, but I told you that it would wear off on you.”
Stacy was puzzled as she looked at Joel and asked, “What?”
“You just said ‘fair enough,’” answered Joel.
“No I didn’t,” said Stacy, thinking about her previous comments.
“John?” asked Joel.
“Yeah,” said John, not looking up from his text message, “you said it.”
“No!” said Stacy, slapping her knee playfully. “I swore that would never happen.”
“It was only a matter of time,” said Joel, smiling while nodding his head.
When the trio arrived at Tiffany’s apartment complex, John exited the vehicle and entered Tiffany’s building. Joel and Stacy sat in his Charger, awaiting the arrival of John and Tiffany.
I am not sure what came over me when John left Joel and myself alone in the car while going up to get Tiffany, but I became so bold in that moment. What I said next was probably-no, it was definitely a mistake.
“So,” asked Stacy, “you really like this Amber girl?
“Well, I haven’t known her very long, but she seems like a really cool girl,” said Joel.
“You think so?” asked Stacy.
“Yeah,” answered Joel. “Why? Did you get another impression?”
“You want my honest opinion?” asked Stacy.
“Yes,” responded Joel.
“I think you could do better,” said Stacy.
“Thanks,” said Joel, “but the girls aren’t exactly lining up at my door.”
“You will find the right girl,” said Stacy. “Who knows, she could be right under your nose.”
Oh no! What am I doing? He is going to see through this for sure! I cannot believe that I just said that!
“Yeah I guess,” said Joel.
“Any girl would be lucky to be with you,” said Stacy.
Shut up! What is wrong with you!? Why can’t you just stop talking!?
“If you say so,” said Joel, with a sigh.
“I do say so,” responded Stacy
It was then that I realized what I was doing. I was building my way to a confession of my love. Then, in what I feel was on purpose, Joel changed the subject.
“I hope the comedians are good tonight,” said Joel.
I grimaced in frustration, but I quickly hid it so that Joel would not notice. “Yeah,” said Stacy softly. “They usually are though.”
There was an awkward silence for a few minutes after Stacy’s comment, but then John returned along with Tiffany. When the two got into Joel’s Charger, they looked at each other as if they were entering a hostile environment. Tiffany leaned up and put her hand gently on Stacy’s right shoulder.
“Is everything ok, Stacy?” asked Tiffany.
“Yeah,” responded Stacy, obviously dejected.
Simultaneously, John leaned up and said, “You okay up there?”
Joel snapped out of his deep thought. “Uh, yeah,” he said. “Yeah. I am good.”
“We need to get going then,” said Stacy. “We don’t want to keep Brian and Lauren waiting.”Joel nodded and started the car, put it in drive, and pulled away from the curve.
When the four of them had reached Chuckles, Joel circled the parking lot once before finding a spot. He pulled in and the four of them exited the vehicle.
Stacy and Tiffany walked ahead as John held Joel back.
“Ok,” said Tiffany. “What happened?”
“Well, uh,” started Stacy, before pausing to sigh. “I have feelings for Joel and I have been trying to tell him, but it just goes wrong every time.”
“Oh,” said Tiffany, not sure what to say.
“It’s ok,” replied Stacy. “I am going to just have to live with the fact that it just wasn’t meant to be I guess.”
“Why don’t you just tell him how you feel?” asked Tiffany.
“It isn’t that easy,” answered Stacy.
“Trust me,” said Tiffany, giving Stacy a distinct look. “You need to tell him.”
Wait, is she trying to tell me that... I think she is!
“Are you sure?” asked Stacy.
“Just tell him,” said Tiffany with a wink.
It was at that point that Stacy walked over to Joel in the middle of the Chuckles parking lot.
“Joel,” said Stacy, walking up to him, “I need to talk to you.”
“Okay,” said Joel, looking over at John, who nodded and walked away.
Stacy watched John walk away, then turned back to Joel. “There is something that I need to tell you,” she said.
“What is it, Stacy?” asked Joel.
I was so nervous. My stomach was in knots. I could barely summon the words to speak. But then I thought about how I had to pretend that I did not have feelings for Joel for so long. It was that thought that made me come out with it.
“I cannot do this anymore, Joel,” said Stacy. “I am tired of hiding behind false feelings.” She paused and looked down, but not long enough for Joel to get a word in. Stacy then raised her head and her eyes met Joel’s. “I love you, Joel.”
I cannot believe it! I told him! Then it hit me, I actually told him. I anxiously awaited his response, but it was not what I had expected or hoped for.
“So at Shenanigans you knew that when I said I love you, I meant as more than a friend?” asked Joel.
“Yes,” answered Stacy. “I am sorr-” Before she could get her apology out, Joel interrupted.
“Then why did you say you loved me only as a friend?” asked Joel, who at this point was growing angry. Before Stacy could answer, Joel continued. “You do not know the heartache that I have gone through since then, Stacy. If you knew what I meant, then why did you do that to me?”
“Maybe I was scared,” said Stacy.
And that was the honest truth. I was scared that night and I panicked. Then Joel started gritting his teeth and looking around like he always did when he got mad.
“But I am telling you now, Joel,” said Stacy. “Why are you angry?”
Joel finally looked back at Stacy. “You have no idea what that did to me. I was devastated!” he shouted. He quickly regained control of himself and continued. “I have been torturing myself for thinking that there was more between us than what really was.”
Stacy, obviously regretful, looked down at the ground. “I am sorry, Joel.”
She looked up and watched Joel walk over to the rest of the group, who by this point, were paying attention. He asked if Brian could take John, Tiffany, and Stacy home, then walked over to his car, got in, and left.
The tears started streaming down my face uncontrollably as I watch Joel speed away. I didn’t now what to do or think. I was numb.
* * *
Monday, May 19, 2008
Episode 17: My Misery
I know, I know; I really messed up this time. Joel tells me that he loves me and what do I do? I panic. Then, I played the friend card. I do not know if Joel meant if he loved me just as a friend or not, but, regardless, it still gave me the opportunity to confess my love for him and I blew it. I have been kicking myself every since it happened last weekend.
I knew what I had to do though. I needed to get Joel to say it again. Then I could tell him exactly how I feel. That is why I have called him pretty much everyday. Maybe if I show interest, it will compel him to do the same.
However, it proved to be more of a chore than I had realized it would be. Every time we hung out at Stratler’s or anywhere else over that week, I laid it on thick, but to no avail. I do not want to make Joel sound mean, but he definitely ignored my advances. Maybe he didn’t love me the way I thought he did.
It was a good thing that I was not going to take no for an answer. That’s right! I’m not giving up that easily.
Anyway, remember when Joel and Dustin had their argument? Well that would soon be pushed back to the forefront as it would soon reach its climactic point. Since Jack has been gone, Dustin had no one but us to hang out with and he and Joel had not exactly been getting along. Well, we all had a problem with him, but Joel was the only one that would actually say something to him.
He never would come right out and say it, but he did chime in with a smart remark that would make Dustin mad, which would make him quiet. Needless to say, nobody seemed to mind.
It was eight o’clock on Saturday night when Stacy arrived at Joel’s apartment. John and Tiffany were already there and the four of them had a few drinks before heading out to go downtown at roughly fifteen minutes after nine.
It was nine thirty on Saturday night when Joel, Stacy, John, and Tiffany piled out of a cab in downtown Charlotte and walked into a bar by the name of Stanky’s. When the foursome walked through the door, they quickly scanned the crowded bar to find their friends, Brian, Lauren, and Dustin. John found them sitting in a booth and started toward them, leading Tiffany, Stacy, and Joel.
Upon arriving at the table, the seven of them exchanged greetings and poured into the booth, large enough to fit the seven of them.
I tried to sit beside Joel, but he pulled an evasive maneuver at the last second and switch which side of the booth he was going to sit on and before I knew it Dustin scooted in beside him, which I knew he absolutely loved.
It was not long before Dustin started nudging him and the two were off to talk to two blonde bimbos. So there I was, stuck there, watching the guy I love hitting on another woman.
“Are you ok?” asked Lauren of Stacy.
Stacy did not answer, looking over at Joel.
“Stacy?” asked Lauren.
Stacy finally snapped out of her trance. “Uh yeah, I’m fine,” she said. She then looked back over at Joel.
“Stacy, just go over there and talk to him,” said Lauren.
“No,” responded Stacy. “The time isn’t right.”
“But he is talking to another girl,” said Lauren.
John, who had no previous knowledge of Stacy’s feelings for Joel, overheard the conversation. Luckily for Stacy, he did not pick up on what they were talking about.
That is when I decided to go into what Lauren and I like to call Stealth Mode.
Stacy motioned toward John and mouthed the phrase, “Let’s talk later. I do not want him to overhear anything.”
Lauren nodded and mouthed the phrase, “Gotcha.”
Ok, so Stealth Mode is when we mouth what we are saying instead of actually saying it, but what can I say? It works!
Anyway, the night did not get easier from there. Much to my dismay, Joel and Dustin did not get shot down. I know its mean and selfish, but I was hoping that the guys would strike out and be right back over to the table. However, that was not the case. This only added to my misery.
We did get a good laugh when Dustin apparently made the other girl mad and stormed off. I was kind of hoping that Joel’s conversation would taper off because of this, but it didn’t. I could see that she was very interested in him.
Stacy sat there in the booth, unable to look away from Joel. It was almost as if it was happening in slow motion as everything else sped around it at one hundred miles per hour. It was at that moment that she knew that she had blown it. The only thing that she could take solace in was the fact that Lauren shared her pain. That, and the alcohol was flowing.
Lauren bought me a drink and the two of us started a conversation that I got lost in. For a while, I forgot about all of my problems. Then, I happened to glance over and see Joel and the blonde swapping numbers and my heart dropped.
Then, something very bizarre happened.
As Joel slipped his phone back into his pocket, Dustin approached, making his way back through the people that filled the bar. When he reached Joel and Amber, he pushed passed Joel, almost knocking him down and walked up to Amber.
I do not know what Dustin said, but it did not sit right with either Joel or his new skank...sorry, I mean lady-friend.
At that point, Lauren and Brian noticed that Stacy was no longer listening to them and turned to see what it was that she was now focused on. After the two of them began to watch the scene, John and Tiffany also joined them in watching.
They watched as Joel grabbed Dustin’s arm and turned him away from the girl that he had been talking to all night. Dustin jerked his arm away from Joel and once again engaged the girl. The girl, who obviously wanted nothing to with him, turned and said something to Joel, then left.
“Dustin must be up to his old tricks,” laughed Brian.
“Obviously,” said John.
“What a jerk,” said Tiffany.
After she walked away Joel confronted Dustin. Only Dustin seemed angry. After a short exchange, Dustin turned and walked away while Joel returned to the table.
“What was that all about?” asked John of Joel as he returned.
“Oh nothing,” said Joel. “Just Dustin being Dustin. You know, same ole, same ole.”
“All too well,” said Lauren.
“I do not know why he has to be that way,” said Stacy.
“I’ve pretty much accepted it by now,” said Joel.
“Yeah, yeah,” said John, “He’s an ass. Now tell me about the girl you just met.”
“Yeah,” said Stacy. “Let’s hear about that.”
I wasn’t being sarcastic, I promise. I really wanted to know about this girl and try to read Joel’s opinion of her so I could try and gauge how much he likes her. We did not get too far into the conversation before an obviously drunk Dustin came back and made a scene.
As Joel stood at the table, talking to Stacy and John, Dustin came up and stood quietly for a few moments. It was obvious that he was bothered by something. Brian glanced over at him and asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” said Dustin, glowering at Joel, who did not notice. A few minutes passed before Dustin spoke again. This time he said, “I’m leaving.”
He said his goodbyes to Brian and Lauren, then made his way around Joel without saying a word to him and told Stacy, John, and Tiffany goodbye, then turned and as he walked back by Joel, he lurched forward, striking Joel with his shoulder.
The impact dislodged Joel’s beer from his hand, which fell to the floor. The glass bottle shattered as the liquid spilled and went everywhere. Dustin stopped, looking up from the floor, he and Joel now stood nose to nose.
Brian quickly stood and got between them as John launched out of the booth to grab Joel. By this time, the eyes of everyone in the bar were on the two men as they were being restrained by their friends.
“What is your problem!?” shouted Joel.
Dustin did not say a word. Instead he continued to stare at Joel as he took a few steps back and eventually turned and walked out of the bar.
“What was that all about?” asked Brian.
“Apparently that girl I met,” responded Joel. “He tried to get between me and her when we were talking and I called him out on it, but not in front of her.”
“You two need to stop,” said Brian sternly. “You are friends.”
Joel shook his head. “No. Not anymore,” he said. “I’m tired of the way he acts toward me.”
“You don’t mean that,” said Brian.
“Yeah, actually I do mean it, Brian,” said Joel. “I’m done with that guy.”
The scary thing about the whole situation was that Joel was serious. I have known him longer than anyone and I can say, without a doubt, that Joel meant what he said. It was the end of their friendship.
I knew what I had to do though. I needed to get Joel to say it again. Then I could tell him exactly how I feel. That is why I have called him pretty much everyday. Maybe if I show interest, it will compel him to do the same.
However, it proved to be more of a chore than I had realized it would be. Every time we hung out at Stratler’s or anywhere else over that week, I laid it on thick, but to no avail. I do not want to make Joel sound mean, but he definitely ignored my advances. Maybe he didn’t love me the way I thought he did.
It was a good thing that I was not going to take no for an answer. That’s right! I’m not giving up that easily.
Anyway, remember when Joel and Dustin had their argument? Well that would soon be pushed back to the forefront as it would soon reach its climactic point. Since Jack has been gone, Dustin had no one but us to hang out with and he and Joel had not exactly been getting along. Well, we all had a problem with him, but Joel was the only one that would actually say something to him.
He never would come right out and say it, but he did chime in with a smart remark that would make Dustin mad, which would make him quiet. Needless to say, nobody seemed to mind.
It was eight o’clock on Saturday night when Stacy arrived at Joel’s apartment. John and Tiffany were already there and the four of them had a few drinks before heading out to go downtown at roughly fifteen minutes after nine.
It was nine thirty on Saturday night when Joel, Stacy, John, and Tiffany piled out of a cab in downtown Charlotte and walked into a bar by the name of Stanky’s. When the foursome walked through the door, they quickly scanned the crowded bar to find their friends, Brian, Lauren, and Dustin. John found them sitting in a booth and started toward them, leading Tiffany, Stacy, and Joel.
Upon arriving at the table, the seven of them exchanged greetings and poured into the booth, large enough to fit the seven of them.
I tried to sit beside Joel, but he pulled an evasive maneuver at the last second and switch which side of the booth he was going to sit on and before I knew it Dustin scooted in beside him, which I knew he absolutely loved.
It was not long before Dustin started nudging him and the two were off to talk to two blonde bimbos. So there I was, stuck there, watching the guy I love hitting on another woman.
“Are you ok?” asked Lauren of Stacy.
Stacy did not answer, looking over at Joel.
“Stacy?” asked Lauren.
Stacy finally snapped out of her trance. “Uh yeah, I’m fine,” she said. She then looked back over at Joel.
“Stacy, just go over there and talk to him,” said Lauren.
“No,” responded Stacy. “The time isn’t right.”
“But he is talking to another girl,” said Lauren.
John, who had no previous knowledge of Stacy’s feelings for Joel, overheard the conversation. Luckily for Stacy, he did not pick up on what they were talking about.
That is when I decided to go into what Lauren and I like to call Stealth Mode.
Stacy motioned toward John and mouthed the phrase, “Let’s talk later. I do not want him to overhear anything.”
Lauren nodded and mouthed the phrase, “Gotcha.”
Ok, so Stealth Mode is when we mouth what we are saying instead of actually saying it, but what can I say? It works!
Anyway, the night did not get easier from there. Much to my dismay, Joel and Dustin did not get shot down. I know its mean and selfish, but I was hoping that the guys would strike out and be right back over to the table. However, that was not the case. This only added to my misery.
We did get a good laugh when Dustin apparently made the other girl mad and stormed off. I was kind of hoping that Joel’s conversation would taper off because of this, but it didn’t. I could see that she was very interested in him.
Stacy sat there in the booth, unable to look away from Joel. It was almost as if it was happening in slow motion as everything else sped around it at one hundred miles per hour. It was at that moment that she knew that she had blown it. The only thing that she could take solace in was the fact that Lauren shared her pain. That, and the alcohol was flowing.
Lauren bought me a drink and the two of us started a conversation that I got lost in. For a while, I forgot about all of my problems. Then, I happened to glance over and see Joel and the blonde swapping numbers and my heart dropped.
Then, something very bizarre happened.
As Joel slipped his phone back into his pocket, Dustin approached, making his way back through the people that filled the bar. When he reached Joel and Amber, he pushed passed Joel, almost knocking him down and walked up to Amber.
I do not know what Dustin said, but it did not sit right with either Joel or his new skank...sorry, I mean lady-friend.
At that point, Lauren and Brian noticed that Stacy was no longer listening to them and turned to see what it was that she was now focused on. After the two of them began to watch the scene, John and Tiffany also joined them in watching.
They watched as Joel grabbed Dustin’s arm and turned him away from the girl that he had been talking to all night. Dustin jerked his arm away from Joel and once again engaged the girl. The girl, who obviously wanted nothing to with him, turned and said something to Joel, then left.
“Dustin must be up to his old tricks,” laughed Brian.
“Obviously,” said John.
“What a jerk,” said Tiffany.
After she walked away Joel confronted Dustin. Only Dustin seemed angry. After a short exchange, Dustin turned and walked away while Joel returned to the table.
“What was that all about?” asked John of Joel as he returned.
“Oh nothing,” said Joel. “Just Dustin being Dustin. You know, same ole, same ole.”
“All too well,” said Lauren.
“I do not know why he has to be that way,” said Stacy.
“I’ve pretty much accepted it by now,” said Joel.
“Yeah, yeah,” said John, “He’s an ass. Now tell me about the girl you just met.”
“Yeah,” said Stacy. “Let’s hear about that.”
I wasn’t being sarcastic, I promise. I really wanted to know about this girl and try to read Joel’s opinion of her so I could try and gauge how much he likes her. We did not get too far into the conversation before an obviously drunk Dustin came back and made a scene.
As Joel stood at the table, talking to Stacy and John, Dustin came up and stood quietly for a few moments. It was obvious that he was bothered by something. Brian glanced over at him and asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” said Dustin, glowering at Joel, who did not notice. A few minutes passed before Dustin spoke again. This time he said, “I’m leaving.”
He said his goodbyes to Brian and Lauren, then made his way around Joel without saying a word to him and told Stacy, John, and Tiffany goodbye, then turned and as he walked back by Joel, he lurched forward, striking Joel with his shoulder.
The impact dislodged Joel’s beer from his hand, which fell to the floor. The glass bottle shattered as the liquid spilled and went everywhere. Dustin stopped, looking up from the floor, he and Joel now stood nose to nose.
Brian quickly stood and got between them as John launched out of the booth to grab Joel. By this time, the eyes of everyone in the bar were on the two men as they were being restrained by their friends.
“What is your problem!?” shouted Joel.
Dustin did not say a word. Instead he continued to stare at Joel as he took a few steps back and eventually turned and walked out of the bar.
“What was that all about?” asked Brian.
“Apparently that girl I met,” responded Joel. “He tried to get between me and her when we were talking and I called him out on it, but not in front of her.”
“You two need to stop,” said Brian sternly. “You are friends.”
Joel shook his head. “No. Not anymore,” he said. “I’m tired of the way he acts toward me.”
“You don’t mean that,” said Brian.
“Yeah, actually I do mean it, Brian,” said Joel. “I’m done with that guy.”
The scary thing about the whole situation was that Joel was serious. I have known him longer than anyone and I can say, without a doubt, that Joel meant what he said. It was the end of their friendship.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Episode 16: No Coming Back
It has been a week and a half since Ron came after me and subsequently Joel went after him. I have talked to Ron only once since going with him to the hospital. That was to confirm the break-up and to plead with him not to press charges against Joel. It was kind of funny because he agreed to not press charges quicker than he accepted me breaking up with him.
As for Joel, I only talked to him to let him know that Ron agreed not to press charges. I was still very angry at him, so I stayed on the phone just long enough to let him know that he would not be going to jail. He, of course, tried to call me at first, but finally gave up when he realized that I was not going to answer. It has been five days since his last attempt.
The truth is, I’m not that mad at him anymore. At first I was furious and I did not want to talk to him. Then, the anger thawed and melted away for the most part and I was not sure what I wanted to say to him. Now, I let the whole thing linger for too long and now it is too weird. And there is still the fact that I still get angry at Joel every time I think about what happened. I do not know what to do.
I will have an opportunity to talk to him tonight at Jack’s farewell party. His job is taking him to Michigan for a few months, so we are getting together tonight.
Lauren sat on Stacy’s couch as she waited for her to get ready to leave.
“Have you thought about what you are going to say to Joel?” asked Lauren of Stacy.
“Not at all,” replied Stacy.
“Are you still mad at him?”
“Yes and no,” said Stacy, sighing while thinking about the whole situation. “I do not know for sure because I haven’t seen or talked to him.”
“I’m sure that everything will work out fine,” said Lauren, trying to reassure her friend.
“I hope so,” said Stacy. “I sure am nervous.”
“I can tell,” replied Lauren.
“Thanks,” said Stacy facetiously.
“Relax,” said Lauren with a laugh. “You will be fine.”
“You are right,” responded Stacy, letting out a deep breath. “I will be. Let’s go.”
The two girls exited Stacy’s apartment, which she turned and locked. They headed down stairs, got in Lauren’s car, and headed off to Jack’s. Stacy grew more and more nervous as she got closer to Jack’s apartment building, which also happened to be Joel’s. she wanted to see him, but at the same time, she did not.
Upon arriving at Jack and Joel’s apartment building, Lauren and Stacy exited the car and began toward the front steps.
“Wait,” said Stacy, stopping in her tracks. “I can’t do this.”
“What?” asked Lauren, a little confused. “Why?”
“I don’t know. I just can’t.”
“Come on,” said Lauren, taking Stacy by the arm. “You will be fine. Just take a deep breath.”
“Ok,” said Stacy, exhaling. “I’m good now.”
With that, the two women entered the building and took the elevator up to Jack’s floor. When the bell rang and the doors slid open, they exited and walked to Jack’s door. Stacy was hesitant, but entered anyway. After discovering that Joel was not there yet, she was relieved.
This is going to be harder than I thought. I should have called Joel before tonight. Waiting was definitely a bad idea. It would be much more awkward in person than over the phone. At least I had a while to get a few beers in me before he got here to loosen myself up.
Stacy immediately grabbed a beer and opened it. She sat rather quietly on the couch while everyone else sat around and enjoyed themselves.
I just was not in the mood to talk. Don’t get me wrong though, I didn’t ignore my friends completely. Dustin, of course, was trying to hit on me the entire time as usual. I brushed him off like I usually did and pretty much ignored him. I would have felt bad, but, well, I know the guy and I just can’t feel bad for him. It wasn’t long after that Joel showed up.
Everyone’s attention was drawn to the door as the knob turned and it opened. Joel, John, and Tiffany walked through the now open doorway. Joel hung back while John and Tiffany walked past. They were greeted by Brian and Dustin, then Jack, Lauren, and Stacy, who upon seeing Joel, turned and walked into the kitchen. She was followed by Lauren.
“Stacy, are you ok?” asked Lauren.
Stacy let out a sigh. “No,” she replied. “I thought I was ready to see him, but I guess I’m not.”
“Just talk to him,” said Lauren.
“I still have no clue what I want to say to him.”
Lauren grimaced as she looked at Stacy. “Just be patient. It will come,” she finally said.
Stacy sadly nodded and the two of them headed back into Jack’s living room.
Remember the ten-ton elephant that was in the corner when I was going to break up with Ron? Well, he’s back and he brought friends. Seeing Joel did confirm one thing though. I was not still mad at him. It was just weird because we left the situation unsettled. Maybe I should have answered one of his calls.
Anyway, as the night went on, he did not try and talk to me, so I assumed that he wanted nothing to do with me. After staying at Jack’s for what seemed like forever, we finally left for downtown.
It was a little past eleven when the eight friends arrived at Shenanigans in downtown Charlotte. They stood in the long line for about fifteen minutes before finally reaching the door. There, the bouncer checked their ID’s to make sure that they were of age and then let them enter.
Loud music greeted the group as they walked came through the entrance. The club itself was practically alive as the walls were vibrating from the boom of the bass. The floor was not visible as people stood and danced shoulder to shoulder.
Shenanigans was a two story club, situated so that when you walked in through the front doors you were at the back of the dance floor. The D.J. stood in his booth, which was located on the back wall. There were two long bars, lining the sides of the interior of the building.
Upon advancing past the bar on the right, a door led to the restrooms. Also in this doorway, stairs could be taken to the second floor of club. The dance floor upstairs covered a little less than half of the first floor, leaving it open to look down at the dance floor below. Exiting the door at the top of the stairs, a walkway, which hugged the wall, led to the upstairs portion of the club, which was above the front doors. After passing a bar, the walkway opened up into the rest of the upstairs area.
Electing to stay on the first floor, Jack and Joel led the group through the sea of people that covered the dance floor and to the bar, where each of them ordered and received drinks. It was not long before Lauren and Tiffany dragged John and Brian onto the dance floor. Stacy was not far behind them as Joel, Jack and Dustin remained at the bar for the time being.
I thought that dancing would take my mind off of things, but it didn’t. I couldn’t help but feel bad for Joel. He just stood there by the bar while the rest of us were dancing. Granted, I know that he does not enjoy dancing like the rest of us, but he has never been the type to just stand by the bar by himself while everyone else is on the dance floor.
Jack and Dustin went over and tried to persuade him to come out and dance, but he didn’t. Brian had no luck either and neither did Lauren. It was then, that I decided to go over and end this stupidity once and for all.
Much to Joel’s surprise, Stacy shook off her nervousness and went over to him. She smiled warmly as she stopped in front of him. “Do you not feel like dancing?” she asked.
Joel smiled. “You know me,” he said, “always a wallflower.” There was a bit of an awkward pause for a moment, before they both started to speak. Both of them stopped to let the other one talk, but Stacy insisted that Joel be the first.
“I really am sorry, Stacy,” said Joel.
“I know,” responded Stacy. “I know you were just looking out for me, but you could have gone about it a different way.”
“Are we going to be ok?” asked Joel, his concern was obvious.
“Yes,” replied Stacy, nodding her head.
“Good,” said Joel.
“Come on,” said Stacy, grabbing Joel’s hand and pulling him away from the bar. “Let’s dance.”
And just like that, all was right with the world. As Joel and I danced, I could not help but feel attracted to him. All of my feelings we resurfacing once again. This time, though, I was single and ready to give into them. And then, Joel said the exact thing that I was wishing he would. But unfortunately, I would get in my own way.
“Stacy,” said Joel, “I have a confession to make.”
“And what is that?” asked Stacy.
“I love you,” said Joel.
“Aww,” said Stacy, smiling brightly. “I love you too...” Oh no! What if he means he loves me as a friend and nothing more? Don’t panic... don’t panic!
But then I did panic. And I blurted out the first thing that popped in my head. “...as a friend.”
No! What have I done!?
“I- I need to go,” said Joel through short quick breaths.
“Are you ok?” asked Stacy, a confused look took hold of her face. Joel looked crushed, but why? Wait, could he have meant...?
“Y-yeah,” he said. “I am fine.”
Joel turned and left Stacy standing there as he headed for the door. She watched as he made his way to the door and exited Shenanigans. She stood there facing a harsh realization.
I really screwed up this time. I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was no coming back from this one.
As for Joel, I only talked to him to let him know that Ron agreed not to press charges. I was still very angry at him, so I stayed on the phone just long enough to let him know that he would not be going to jail. He, of course, tried to call me at first, but finally gave up when he realized that I was not going to answer. It has been five days since his last attempt.
The truth is, I’m not that mad at him anymore. At first I was furious and I did not want to talk to him. Then, the anger thawed and melted away for the most part and I was not sure what I wanted to say to him. Now, I let the whole thing linger for too long and now it is too weird. And there is still the fact that I still get angry at Joel every time I think about what happened. I do not know what to do.
I will have an opportunity to talk to him tonight at Jack’s farewell party. His job is taking him to Michigan for a few months, so we are getting together tonight.
Lauren sat on Stacy’s couch as she waited for her to get ready to leave.
“Have you thought about what you are going to say to Joel?” asked Lauren of Stacy.
“Not at all,” replied Stacy.
“Are you still mad at him?”
“Yes and no,” said Stacy, sighing while thinking about the whole situation. “I do not know for sure because I haven’t seen or talked to him.”
“I’m sure that everything will work out fine,” said Lauren, trying to reassure her friend.
“I hope so,” said Stacy. “I sure am nervous.”
“I can tell,” replied Lauren.
“Thanks,” said Stacy facetiously.
“Relax,” said Lauren with a laugh. “You will be fine.”
“You are right,” responded Stacy, letting out a deep breath. “I will be. Let’s go.”
The two girls exited Stacy’s apartment, which she turned and locked. They headed down stairs, got in Lauren’s car, and headed off to Jack’s. Stacy grew more and more nervous as she got closer to Jack’s apartment building, which also happened to be Joel’s. she wanted to see him, but at the same time, she did not.
Upon arriving at Jack and Joel’s apartment building, Lauren and Stacy exited the car and began toward the front steps.
“Wait,” said Stacy, stopping in her tracks. “I can’t do this.”
“What?” asked Lauren, a little confused. “Why?”
“I don’t know. I just can’t.”
“Come on,” said Lauren, taking Stacy by the arm. “You will be fine. Just take a deep breath.”
“Ok,” said Stacy, exhaling. “I’m good now.”
With that, the two women entered the building and took the elevator up to Jack’s floor. When the bell rang and the doors slid open, they exited and walked to Jack’s door. Stacy was hesitant, but entered anyway. After discovering that Joel was not there yet, she was relieved.
This is going to be harder than I thought. I should have called Joel before tonight. Waiting was definitely a bad idea. It would be much more awkward in person than over the phone. At least I had a while to get a few beers in me before he got here to loosen myself up.
Stacy immediately grabbed a beer and opened it. She sat rather quietly on the couch while everyone else sat around and enjoyed themselves.
I just was not in the mood to talk. Don’t get me wrong though, I didn’t ignore my friends completely. Dustin, of course, was trying to hit on me the entire time as usual. I brushed him off like I usually did and pretty much ignored him. I would have felt bad, but, well, I know the guy and I just can’t feel bad for him. It wasn’t long after that Joel showed up.
Everyone’s attention was drawn to the door as the knob turned and it opened. Joel, John, and Tiffany walked through the now open doorway. Joel hung back while John and Tiffany walked past. They were greeted by Brian and Dustin, then Jack, Lauren, and Stacy, who upon seeing Joel, turned and walked into the kitchen. She was followed by Lauren.
“Stacy, are you ok?” asked Lauren.
Stacy let out a sigh. “No,” she replied. “I thought I was ready to see him, but I guess I’m not.”
“Just talk to him,” said Lauren.
“I still have no clue what I want to say to him.”
Lauren grimaced as she looked at Stacy. “Just be patient. It will come,” she finally said.
Stacy sadly nodded and the two of them headed back into Jack’s living room.
Remember the ten-ton elephant that was in the corner when I was going to break up with Ron? Well, he’s back and he brought friends. Seeing Joel did confirm one thing though. I was not still mad at him. It was just weird because we left the situation unsettled. Maybe I should have answered one of his calls.
Anyway, as the night went on, he did not try and talk to me, so I assumed that he wanted nothing to do with me. After staying at Jack’s for what seemed like forever, we finally left for downtown.
It was a little past eleven when the eight friends arrived at Shenanigans in downtown Charlotte. They stood in the long line for about fifteen minutes before finally reaching the door. There, the bouncer checked their ID’s to make sure that they were of age and then let them enter.
Loud music greeted the group as they walked came through the entrance. The club itself was practically alive as the walls were vibrating from the boom of the bass. The floor was not visible as people stood and danced shoulder to shoulder.
Shenanigans was a two story club, situated so that when you walked in through the front doors you were at the back of the dance floor. The D.J. stood in his booth, which was located on the back wall. There were two long bars, lining the sides of the interior of the building.
Upon advancing past the bar on the right, a door led to the restrooms. Also in this doorway, stairs could be taken to the second floor of club. The dance floor upstairs covered a little less than half of the first floor, leaving it open to look down at the dance floor below. Exiting the door at the top of the stairs, a walkway, which hugged the wall, led to the upstairs portion of the club, which was above the front doors. After passing a bar, the walkway opened up into the rest of the upstairs area.
Electing to stay on the first floor, Jack and Joel led the group through the sea of people that covered the dance floor and to the bar, where each of them ordered and received drinks. It was not long before Lauren and Tiffany dragged John and Brian onto the dance floor. Stacy was not far behind them as Joel, Jack and Dustin remained at the bar for the time being.
I thought that dancing would take my mind off of things, but it didn’t. I couldn’t help but feel bad for Joel. He just stood there by the bar while the rest of us were dancing. Granted, I know that he does not enjoy dancing like the rest of us, but he has never been the type to just stand by the bar by himself while everyone else is on the dance floor.
Jack and Dustin went over and tried to persuade him to come out and dance, but he didn’t. Brian had no luck either and neither did Lauren. It was then, that I decided to go over and end this stupidity once and for all.
Much to Joel’s surprise, Stacy shook off her nervousness and went over to him. She smiled warmly as she stopped in front of him. “Do you not feel like dancing?” she asked.
Joel smiled. “You know me,” he said, “always a wallflower.” There was a bit of an awkward pause for a moment, before they both started to speak. Both of them stopped to let the other one talk, but Stacy insisted that Joel be the first.
“I really am sorry, Stacy,” said Joel.
“I know,” responded Stacy. “I know you were just looking out for me, but you could have gone about it a different way.”
“Are we going to be ok?” asked Joel, his concern was obvious.
“Yes,” replied Stacy, nodding her head.
“Good,” said Joel.
“Come on,” said Stacy, grabbing Joel’s hand and pulling him away from the bar. “Let’s dance.”
And just like that, all was right with the world. As Joel and I danced, I could not help but feel attracted to him. All of my feelings we resurfacing once again. This time, though, I was single and ready to give into them. And then, Joel said the exact thing that I was wishing he would. But unfortunately, I would get in my own way.
“Stacy,” said Joel, “I have a confession to make.”
“And what is that?” asked Stacy.
“I love you,” said Joel.
“Aww,” said Stacy, smiling brightly. “I love you too...” Oh no! What if he means he loves me as a friend and nothing more? Don’t panic... don’t panic!
But then I did panic. And I blurted out the first thing that popped in my head. “...as a friend.”
No! What have I done!?
“I- I need to go,” said Joel through short quick breaths.
“Are you ok?” asked Stacy, a confused look took hold of her face. Joel looked crushed, but why? Wait, could he have meant...?
“Y-yeah,” he said. “I am fine.”
Joel turned and left Stacy standing there as he headed for the door. She watched as he made his way to the door and exited Shenanigans. She stood there facing a harsh realization.
I really screwed up this time. I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was no coming back from this one.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Episode 15: The Break-Up
A few days have passed since I walked out on Ron this past Saturday and things have not gotten any better between Ron and myself. I have been pushing the thoughts aside and enduring, what can only be described as, this toxic relationship for far too long. So as tough as it was, I have come to a decision. I am going to break up with Ron.
The only problem with that is, I have no idea when, where, or even how I am going to do it. All I know at this point is that it has to be done. I have only talked to Ron on the phone since Saturday and I do not plan on breaking up with him over the phone. He at least deserves to hear it in person. I would have done it after our nightly trip to Stratler’s last night, which was Monday, but he had to work. My next opportunity would be tonight.
I had rehearsed the whole thing in my head since I had come to this decision on Sunday evening. I was nervous all day on Tuesday and kept running through possible scenarios in my head. I drifted through the day, barely getting anything done. It is a wonder how I managed to stay off the radar that day especially given my low productivity.
Upon getting off of work, Stacy drove back to her apartment. As each second passed, she grew more and more nervous over the fact that she was going to break up with Ron on that evening. She kept rehearsing what she had panned to say, but eventually started to think if she could go through with the whole thing.
Then, she reassured herself that it was the right thing to do and regained control over her nerves. When she got home, she began to think about how it was the best for both of them and then a thought occurred.
I am going to be single.
It was a weird feeling for Stacy, seeing as how she had not been single for quite some time. The more she though about it, the more liberated she felt. It was almost as if the weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulders. But it came crashing back down upon her when she started to think about the daunting task ahead of her.
Ron had not gotten off of work yet, forcing Stacy to take a cab down to Stratler’s, which was no more than a mile and a half away from her apartment building. As fate would have it, upon arriving at Stratler’s, Stacy found Ron awaiting her arrival outside. The greetings were awkward, as the two had not seen each other since Saturday night. The awkwardness did not last long because shortly after Stacy’s arrival, Lauren showed up and the three of them went inside to join their three friends.
Well the night was off to a... well let’s just say it was off. Seeing Ron after I had decided to break up with him was a lot more awkward than I had anticipated. I am just glad that Lauren came along to bail me out. There was, however, a lingering tension between Ron and myself.
When we got inside, we got to listen to another tale of Dustin, the incredible ass. After listening to what he had done to poor Molly, we could not help but laugh.
“Are you serious?” asked Lauren.
“I’m afraid so,” said Joel.
“What a pompous ass,” said Lauren bluntly. “I cannot believe that he did that!”
“I can,” responded Joel sheepishly, raising his beer to his mouth to take a sip.
After everyone shared a laugh and a few more comments about Dustin’s latest stunt, they veered off of the topic and on to a new one.
The night was off to a good start. Well, except for the two ton elephant sitting in the corner. I was ignoring it for now, but I knew that sooner or later, it would have to be addressed. Little did I know, that time would come a lot sooner than later.
Apparently Ron is really insecure, and on top of that, he is very threatened by Joel. Later in the evening, Joel said something funny and apparently Ron did not like how long or hard I laughed. He did not think that it was particularly funny which meant that in no possible way, should it be funny to anyone else, especially me. It couldn’t be the fact that he was not fond of Joel and that is the reason he did not think what he said was funny. Ok, sorry. I will get off of my little tangent here.
After Joel’s funny comment, he went to the restroom and Ron started.
“Why don’t you go with your boyfriend?” asked Ron of Stacy.
Stacy sighed and rolled her eyes. “Ron,” she said, “don’t start with that again.”
“I am just calling it like I see it,” said Ron.
“I said don’t start,” growled Stacy through gritted teeth. She was careful not to raise her voice so that she would not draw the attention of her other friends.
“You are going to sit there and lie to me?” asked Ron, who was growing angrier.
“Lie?” asked Stacy, who was also becoming angry. “I have not said anything that could be misconstrued or interpreted as a lie, Ron.”
“Yeah, whatever,” said Ron. “I am tired of this.”
“You know what? I am too!” said Stacy angrily. She stood and pushed her chair back forcibly, then stormed out of Stratler’s.
Joel exited the restroom to find Stacy marching out of Stratler’s with Ron right on her heels. As he watched the two of them argue through the front window, he quickly made his way back to the table to find out what happened.
Once outside, Stacy and Ron began to argue.
“Why don’t you just admit it?” asked Ron.
“Admit what?” replied Stacy.
“That you are in love with Joel!” shouted Ron.
“Are you that insecure, Ron!?”
“Just admit it, Stacy. I do-”
Stacy stopped Ron in mid-sentence and said, “That’s it, Ron. I can’t do this anymore.”
“What!?” exclaimed Ron, he began to yell uncontrollably as his face turned beet red.
It was not long after, when Ron started at Stacy. Stacy was terrified as she began to back away. Ron took two steps toward her and raised his hand, looking as if he were going to strike Stacy. She raised her hands, putting them in front of her face defensively.
That was the first time that I was legitimately scared of Ron. He had gotten mad before, but never like this. I am not justifying his reaction or coming at me at all, but he had been drinking, which could have caused this heightened reaction. All I know is that he was coming at me and I did not know what was going to happen or what I would even try to do to stop him. I guess it is a good thing that Joel came along.
Before Ron could do anything else, Joel came out of nowhere and punched him right between the eyes. Ron’s feet went out from under him, sending him to the pavement below. When he hit the pavement, he laid there dazed.
Do not get me wrong, I know that Ron had this coming and if it would not have happened, there is no telling what he would have done. Unfortunately the only emotion that came over me was rage. And the only thing I could say was...
Joel was shaking his hand as it was writhing in pain as he turned to face Stacy. She was stunned as she looked up at him. It was almost as if she did not recognize him. “Why would you do that?” she asked.
“Stacy, he was going to hit you,” said Joel, defending his actions.
“So you just hit him!?” yelled Stacy, pushing past Joel to attend to Ron. “You are no better than him!”
“I-I’m sorry Stacy, I don’t know what came over me.”
“Just get away from us!”
Ron’s nose was bleeding pretty badly when I got to him. Good thing somebody on the street who was passing by called 911, because I was starting to panic. Ron, who was an EMT, knew exactly what to do, even in his dazed state. By this time, all of my anger had melted away. One thought repeated itself over and over in my head.
What the hell was Joel thinking?
The only problem with that is, I have no idea when, where, or even how I am going to do it. All I know at this point is that it has to be done. I have only talked to Ron on the phone since Saturday and I do not plan on breaking up with him over the phone. He at least deserves to hear it in person. I would have done it after our nightly trip to Stratler’s last night, which was Monday, but he had to work. My next opportunity would be tonight.
I had rehearsed the whole thing in my head since I had come to this decision on Sunday evening. I was nervous all day on Tuesday and kept running through possible scenarios in my head. I drifted through the day, barely getting anything done. It is a wonder how I managed to stay off the radar that day especially given my low productivity.
Upon getting off of work, Stacy drove back to her apartment. As each second passed, she grew more and more nervous over the fact that she was going to break up with Ron on that evening. She kept rehearsing what she had panned to say, but eventually started to think if she could go through with the whole thing.
Then, she reassured herself that it was the right thing to do and regained control over her nerves. When she got home, she began to think about how it was the best for both of them and then a thought occurred.
I am going to be single.
It was a weird feeling for Stacy, seeing as how she had not been single for quite some time. The more she though about it, the more liberated she felt. It was almost as if the weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulders. But it came crashing back down upon her when she started to think about the daunting task ahead of her.
Ron had not gotten off of work yet, forcing Stacy to take a cab down to Stratler’s, which was no more than a mile and a half away from her apartment building. As fate would have it, upon arriving at Stratler’s, Stacy found Ron awaiting her arrival outside. The greetings were awkward, as the two had not seen each other since Saturday night. The awkwardness did not last long because shortly after Stacy’s arrival, Lauren showed up and the three of them went inside to join their three friends.
Well the night was off to a... well let’s just say it was off. Seeing Ron after I had decided to break up with him was a lot more awkward than I had anticipated. I am just glad that Lauren came along to bail me out. There was, however, a lingering tension between Ron and myself.
When we got inside, we got to listen to another tale of Dustin, the incredible ass. After listening to what he had done to poor Molly, we could not help but laugh.
“Are you serious?” asked Lauren.
“I’m afraid so,” said Joel.
“What a pompous ass,” said Lauren bluntly. “I cannot believe that he did that!”
“I can,” responded Joel sheepishly, raising his beer to his mouth to take a sip.
After everyone shared a laugh and a few more comments about Dustin’s latest stunt, they veered off of the topic and on to a new one.
The night was off to a good start. Well, except for the two ton elephant sitting in the corner. I was ignoring it for now, but I knew that sooner or later, it would have to be addressed. Little did I know, that time would come a lot sooner than later.
Apparently Ron is really insecure, and on top of that, he is very threatened by Joel. Later in the evening, Joel said something funny and apparently Ron did not like how long or hard I laughed. He did not think that it was particularly funny which meant that in no possible way, should it be funny to anyone else, especially me. It couldn’t be the fact that he was not fond of Joel and that is the reason he did not think what he said was funny. Ok, sorry. I will get off of my little tangent here.
After Joel’s funny comment, he went to the restroom and Ron started.
“Why don’t you go with your boyfriend?” asked Ron of Stacy.
Stacy sighed and rolled her eyes. “Ron,” she said, “don’t start with that again.”
“I am just calling it like I see it,” said Ron.
“I said don’t start,” growled Stacy through gritted teeth. She was careful not to raise her voice so that she would not draw the attention of her other friends.
“You are going to sit there and lie to me?” asked Ron, who was growing angrier.
“Lie?” asked Stacy, who was also becoming angry. “I have not said anything that could be misconstrued or interpreted as a lie, Ron.”
“Yeah, whatever,” said Ron. “I am tired of this.”
“You know what? I am too!” said Stacy angrily. She stood and pushed her chair back forcibly, then stormed out of Stratler’s.
Joel exited the restroom to find Stacy marching out of Stratler’s with Ron right on her heels. As he watched the two of them argue through the front window, he quickly made his way back to the table to find out what happened.
Once outside, Stacy and Ron began to argue.
“Why don’t you just admit it?” asked Ron.
“Admit what?” replied Stacy.
“That you are in love with Joel!” shouted Ron.
“Are you that insecure, Ron!?”
“Just admit it, Stacy. I do-”
Stacy stopped Ron in mid-sentence and said, “That’s it, Ron. I can’t do this anymore.”
“What!?” exclaimed Ron, he began to yell uncontrollably as his face turned beet red.
It was not long after, when Ron started at Stacy. Stacy was terrified as she began to back away. Ron took two steps toward her and raised his hand, looking as if he were going to strike Stacy. She raised her hands, putting them in front of her face defensively.
That was the first time that I was legitimately scared of Ron. He had gotten mad before, but never like this. I am not justifying his reaction or coming at me at all, but he had been drinking, which could have caused this heightened reaction. All I know is that he was coming at me and I did not know what was going to happen or what I would even try to do to stop him. I guess it is a good thing that Joel came along.
Before Ron could do anything else, Joel came out of nowhere and punched him right between the eyes. Ron’s feet went out from under him, sending him to the pavement below. When he hit the pavement, he laid there dazed.
Do not get me wrong, I know that Ron had this coming and if it would not have happened, there is no telling what he would have done. Unfortunately the only emotion that came over me was rage. And the only thing I could say was...
Joel was shaking his hand as it was writhing in pain as he turned to face Stacy. She was stunned as she looked up at him. It was almost as if she did not recognize him. “Why would you do that?” she asked.
“Stacy, he was going to hit you,” said Joel, defending his actions.
“So you just hit him!?” yelled Stacy, pushing past Joel to attend to Ron. “You are no better than him!”
“I-I’m sorry Stacy, I don’t know what came over me.”
“Just get away from us!”
Ron’s nose was bleeding pretty badly when I got to him. Good thing somebody on the street who was passing by called 911, because I was starting to panic. Ron, who was an EMT, knew exactly what to do, even in his dazed state. By this time, all of my anger had melted away. One thought repeated itself over and over in my head.
What the hell was Joel thinking?
Monday, April 28, 2008
Episode 14: Her Tough Decision
I woke up Saturday morning with a headache, but it was because of more than just the slight hangover that I had. My mind was cluttered. Ron lied, so break up with him right? Wrong. It is not that easy. Ron and I have been through a lot. He has helped me through a lot of tough times as I have for him. I know what he did was wrong and I won’t soon forget about it. He will definitely have to do a lot of groveling to get back on my good side, I will tell you that.
I woke up around nine and spent all morning thinking about the previous night’s events. How could he do that to me? Am I that unbearable to be around that he has to lie to me so he can go out with his friends? I do not remember the last time I was this angry.
My phone started ringing around eleven that morning.
“Wow,” said Stacy, picking up her phone to see Ron’s name on the screen, “He is up before noon on a day that he does not have to work. He must know that he really messed up this time.”
Hmph, this time. I don’t know why I even put up with his mess time after time. How much is too much? He is definitely on thin ice. The more I thought about it, the more I started hoping that the “ice” beneath him would eventually break. Does that make me a bad person? Overall, he has been a good boyfriend. I don’t know what to do.
I ignored the call and went on about my morning, cleaning up my apartment and doing my laundry. Then, about thirty minutes later, my phone rang again. Upon inspecting the screen of my phone, I saw Ron’s name again.
“Nope,” said Stacy, shaking her head and walking away from the table in which her phone rested. “I think I will let you suffer a little longer.”
I had not even begun to think about what I was going to say to him. I couldn’t think about the previous night without wanting to smack him right in the face, which is what I probably should have done. That would have served him right. No, I could not bring myself to strike anyone. That just is not me. I am going to have to get over being mad before I can think about what I want to say. Until then, he can wait.
Unfortunately, he had other ideas. I guess he thought that calling every twenty to thirty minutes would help me get over it faster. He was wrong. I eventually switched my phone over to vibrate and he eventually gave up...after calling eight times and leaving three messages. I actually started to feel bad, but all I had to do to shake that feeling was think about the previous night. At two o’clock Lauren stopped by.
“Hi,” said Stacy with a slight grimace as she opened her door to let Lauren in.
“Hey girl,” responded Lauren. “How are you?”
“Been better,” answered Stacy.
“Have you talked to him?” asked Lauren.
“No. I still haven’t figured out what I want to say to him.”
“Still angry huh?”
“Oh yes,” answered Stacy, shaking her head as she grit her teeth in anger.
Lauren saw that Stacy was becoming upset and immediately began to calm her down. “Easy girl,” said Lauren. “I didn’t come over here to stir you up.”
“I know. It just still angers me that he would do that he would lie to me.”
“I never thought that he would be the type of guy to do that.”
“Yeah, well anyway,” said Stacy. “I’m not going to spend my whole day thinking about it.”
“Good for you,” said Lauren. “We are going out tonight. Do you want to come?”
“Yeah, definitely,” answered Stacy.
It was at that point that there was a knock on the door. Puzzled, Stacy walked over and looked through the peephole. Much to her surprise, there stood Ron, holding a dozen roses. Stacy’s anger immediately melted away at the sight. She immediately opened the door.
“Hey,” said Ron with a half smile.
“Hi,” said Stacy, gazing at Ron, dazed with affection.
“Stacy, I am so sorry,” said Ron, genuine sorrow filled his voice. “I have been torturing myself since last night and I couldn’t stand it anymore, so here I stand, throwing myself at your mercy and begging you to forgive me.”
In all honesty, he could have said pretty much anything right then and I would have forgiven him. Although, my decision to forgive Ron and not dump him was not a popular one with the rest of the group. Being my best friend, Lauren felt as betrayed as I did, but she would not be won back as easily as I was. In fact, she would never trust Ron again.
Stacy all but leapt at Ron, throwing her arms around his neck, then kissing him. “I forgive you,” she said, relinquishing the kiss, “but it better not ever happen again.”
“It won’t.” said Ron, reassuring Stacy.
“Good,” replied Stacy.
Lauren rolled her eyes and grabbed her coat. “I’ll call you later,” she said as she passed Stacy and Ron.
“O-ok,” said Stacy, confused as to why Lauren was leaving with such haste. “See you later.”
Ron did not stay long, eventually leaving after twenty minutes. He stopped by Stacy’s on his way to work. Stacy searched for, and found, a vase for the roses and put them in it. After situating the flowers on her kitchen table, she spent the rest of the afternoon finishing her chores. By the time she was done, it was after five.
After eating dinner, Stacy called Joel to see what everyone had planned for the night ahead. Joel told her that they would be meeting at Stratler’s later that evening, then heading downtown. Stacy had planned on riding with Lauren and Brian, but Ron surprised her yet again by switching shifts and getting off to go out with her. Stacy then texted Joel and Lauren to let them know that the two of them would meet the rest of the group downtown instead of at Stratler’s as previously planned.
I was actually excited about going out. Now that things were fine between Ron and myself, I wanted to put the ugly incident behind us.
When Ron got to Stacy’s, the two of them headed downtown to meet up with the rest of their friends. Stacy mentioned that Joel and Katie were having some problems to Ron in hopes that he would not bring it up. Ron brushed off the comments about Joel as he usually did, which caught the attention of Stacy.
“Are you ok?” asked Stacy.
“Yeah,” said Ron. “I’m fine.”
“Then why did you make that face when I told you about Joel?” asked Stacy. “How many times do I have to tell you that we are just friends?”
“Well it sure doesn’t seem that way,” replied Ron.
“Really, Ron?” asked Stacy, starting to become annoyed. “Are you already starting?”
“Starting what?” asked Ron. “I didn’t say anything. You are the one that brought it up.”
“Whatever,” said Stacy. “Can we just have a nice night out?”
“Yes,” replied Ron.
The two rode in silence until the reached the bar in which their friends were at. When they entered the bar, they located the rest of the group and joined them near the bar to have drinks. Everyone was having a good time, except for Joel, who seemed distant.
Joel was miserable. I wanted nothing more than to walk over and give him a hug, but I did not want to remind him of his sorrows. As we moved from bar to bar, Joel’s mood seemed to get worse. Finally he started to bug John for his phone back which I found humorous. He actually started to sound like his old self.
“Give me my phone,” said Joel.
“Nope,” responded John.
“Come on, John,” pleaded Joel. “I just want to check my messages. I won’t call her.”
“Yes you will.”
“Just give me my phone,” demanded Joel.
“Nope.”
It went on like that for a while until Joel eventually stopped, but then, minutes later, he started again. Finally John handed the phone over to Joel, who headed for the door. He stepped out for a minute before coming right back in. After chatting with Jack for a minute, he came over and said his goodbyes and left. I felt horrible for him, but that feeling quickly passed as Ron started at me again and being that he had some drinks in him, he came right out with it.
“Why don’t you just go with him?” asked Ron of Stacy.
“Ron, don’t start,” responded Stacy. “I just feel bad for him, that’s all.”
“Yeah, right,” said Ron.
“Ok, you are drunk,” said Stacy, “so I am going to let this go. I am, however, leaving.”
After saying her farewells, Stacy left and got a cab which took her home.
I know, I know; Ron and I cannot continue on like this. Time and time again, he took me for granted and I was sick of it. I have a tough decision to make...
I woke up around nine and spent all morning thinking about the previous night’s events. How could he do that to me? Am I that unbearable to be around that he has to lie to me so he can go out with his friends? I do not remember the last time I was this angry.
My phone started ringing around eleven that morning.
“Wow,” said Stacy, picking up her phone to see Ron’s name on the screen, “He is up before noon on a day that he does not have to work. He must know that he really messed up this time.”
Hmph, this time. I don’t know why I even put up with his mess time after time. How much is too much? He is definitely on thin ice. The more I thought about it, the more I started hoping that the “ice” beneath him would eventually break. Does that make me a bad person? Overall, he has been a good boyfriend. I don’t know what to do.
I ignored the call and went on about my morning, cleaning up my apartment and doing my laundry. Then, about thirty minutes later, my phone rang again. Upon inspecting the screen of my phone, I saw Ron’s name again.
“Nope,” said Stacy, shaking her head and walking away from the table in which her phone rested. “I think I will let you suffer a little longer.”
I had not even begun to think about what I was going to say to him. I couldn’t think about the previous night without wanting to smack him right in the face, which is what I probably should have done. That would have served him right. No, I could not bring myself to strike anyone. That just is not me. I am going to have to get over being mad before I can think about what I want to say. Until then, he can wait.
Unfortunately, he had other ideas. I guess he thought that calling every twenty to thirty minutes would help me get over it faster. He was wrong. I eventually switched my phone over to vibrate and he eventually gave up...after calling eight times and leaving three messages. I actually started to feel bad, but all I had to do to shake that feeling was think about the previous night. At two o’clock Lauren stopped by.
“Hi,” said Stacy with a slight grimace as she opened her door to let Lauren in.
“Hey girl,” responded Lauren. “How are you?”
“Been better,” answered Stacy.
“Have you talked to him?” asked Lauren.
“No. I still haven’t figured out what I want to say to him.”
“Still angry huh?”
“Oh yes,” answered Stacy, shaking her head as she grit her teeth in anger.
Lauren saw that Stacy was becoming upset and immediately began to calm her down. “Easy girl,” said Lauren. “I didn’t come over here to stir you up.”
“I know. It just still angers me that he would do that he would lie to me.”
“I never thought that he would be the type of guy to do that.”
“Yeah, well anyway,” said Stacy. “I’m not going to spend my whole day thinking about it.”
“Good for you,” said Lauren. “We are going out tonight. Do you want to come?”
“Yeah, definitely,” answered Stacy.
It was at that point that there was a knock on the door. Puzzled, Stacy walked over and looked through the peephole. Much to her surprise, there stood Ron, holding a dozen roses. Stacy’s anger immediately melted away at the sight. She immediately opened the door.
“Hey,” said Ron with a half smile.
“Hi,” said Stacy, gazing at Ron, dazed with affection.
“Stacy, I am so sorry,” said Ron, genuine sorrow filled his voice. “I have been torturing myself since last night and I couldn’t stand it anymore, so here I stand, throwing myself at your mercy and begging you to forgive me.”
In all honesty, he could have said pretty much anything right then and I would have forgiven him. Although, my decision to forgive Ron and not dump him was not a popular one with the rest of the group. Being my best friend, Lauren felt as betrayed as I did, but she would not be won back as easily as I was. In fact, she would never trust Ron again.
Stacy all but leapt at Ron, throwing her arms around his neck, then kissing him. “I forgive you,” she said, relinquishing the kiss, “but it better not ever happen again.”
“It won’t.” said Ron, reassuring Stacy.
“Good,” replied Stacy.
Lauren rolled her eyes and grabbed her coat. “I’ll call you later,” she said as she passed Stacy and Ron.
“O-ok,” said Stacy, confused as to why Lauren was leaving with such haste. “See you later.”
Ron did not stay long, eventually leaving after twenty minutes. He stopped by Stacy’s on his way to work. Stacy searched for, and found, a vase for the roses and put them in it. After situating the flowers on her kitchen table, she spent the rest of the afternoon finishing her chores. By the time she was done, it was after five.
After eating dinner, Stacy called Joel to see what everyone had planned for the night ahead. Joel told her that they would be meeting at Stratler’s later that evening, then heading downtown. Stacy had planned on riding with Lauren and Brian, but Ron surprised her yet again by switching shifts and getting off to go out with her. Stacy then texted Joel and Lauren to let them know that the two of them would meet the rest of the group downtown instead of at Stratler’s as previously planned.
I was actually excited about going out. Now that things were fine between Ron and myself, I wanted to put the ugly incident behind us.
When Ron got to Stacy’s, the two of them headed downtown to meet up with the rest of their friends. Stacy mentioned that Joel and Katie were having some problems to Ron in hopes that he would not bring it up. Ron brushed off the comments about Joel as he usually did, which caught the attention of Stacy.
“Are you ok?” asked Stacy.
“Yeah,” said Ron. “I’m fine.”
“Then why did you make that face when I told you about Joel?” asked Stacy. “How many times do I have to tell you that we are just friends?”
“Well it sure doesn’t seem that way,” replied Ron.
“Really, Ron?” asked Stacy, starting to become annoyed. “Are you already starting?”
“Starting what?” asked Ron. “I didn’t say anything. You are the one that brought it up.”
“Whatever,” said Stacy. “Can we just have a nice night out?”
“Yes,” replied Ron.
The two rode in silence until the reached the bar in which their friends were at. When they entered the bar, they located the rest of the group and joined them near the bar to have drinks. Everyone was having a good time, except for Joel, who seemed distant.
Joel was miserable. I wanted nothing more than to walk over and give him a hug, but I did not want to remind him of his sorrows. As we moved from bar to bar, Joel’s mood seemed to get worse. Finally he started to bug John for his phone back which I found humorous. He actually started to sound like his old self.
“Give me my phone,” said Joel.
“Nope,” responded John.
“Come on, John,” pleaded Joel. “I just want to check my messages. I won’t call her.”
“Yes you will.”
“Just give me my phone,” demanded Joel.
“Nope.”
It went on like that for a while until Joel eventually stopped, but then, minutes later, he started again. Finally John handed the phone over to Joel, who headed for the door. He stepped out for a minute before coming right back in. After chatting with Jack for a minute, he came over and said his goodbyes and left. I felt horrible for him, but that feeling quickly passed as Ron started at me again and being that he had some drinks in him, he came right out with it.
“Why don’t you just go with him?” asked Ron of Stacy.
“Ron, don’t start,” responded Stacy. “I just feel bad for him, that’s all.”
“Yeah, right,” said Ron.
“Ok, you are drunk,” said Stacy, “so I am going to let this go. I am, however, leaving.”
After saying her farewells, Stacy left and got a cab which took her home.
I know, I know; Ron and I cannot continue on like this. Time and time again, he took me for granted and I was sick of it. I have a tough decision to make...
Monday, April 21, 2008
Episode 13: A Night Out
Things had settled a bit since Joel blew out Dustin. Although you could not pay the two to get them in the same room together. On a few occasions it actually happened and it was absolutely miserable for everyone. Both of them refused to give any ground. I could understand that on Joel’s behalf, but I still do not see where Dustin gets off being so self righteous. He is completely in the wrong.
Unfortunately, he did not feel that way. Every time we were out and Joel was not coming or had not gotten there yet, all he did was talk about his disdain for Joel and his actions. Sometimes I wonder what it is like to be someone who is completely detached from reality. Then, I am very thankful that I am not like Dustin.
It was Friday night and Ron was at work. Joel had invited me to go with him, Katie, John, Tiffany, Lauren, and Brian to the movies, but I declined. That feeling that hit me the night that Joel and Dustin got into it was still lingering. It was hard to be around Joel and Katie when they were together. I do not know what the deal is. Maybe I am jealous.
So there I sat, in my apartment alone with a bottle of wine, watching some movies.
Stacy sat on her couched, curled up in a blanket. All that was exposed was her head and her hand, which held a glass of wine. She was staring intently at her television. She had just finished her first movie and got up to pop some popcorn for the second at nine fifteen when her cell phone rang.
“Hey, Lauren,” said Stacy, putting her phone to her ear.
“Hey girl,” said Lauren. “Why didn’t you come to the movie?” Stacy hesitated and before she could say anything, Lauren said, “It’s because of Joel and Katie right?”
“Yeah,” answered Stacy. “Hey wait a minute, aren’t you with Brian?”
“Yeah,” replied Lauren. “You should know by now that I tell him everything. He won’t say anything.”
“Fair enough,” said Stacy.
“Girl, you were right,” said Lauren. “Joel is wearing off on you. You just said ‘fair enough’ again.”
“Darnit!” said Stacy. “I made the mistake of saying it in front of him and I never thought I would hear the end of it. I told him that it wasn’t going to happen.”
“Awww, you are so cute!” said Lauren semi-excitedly.
“What do you mean?” asked Stacy.
“When you talk about Joel, you just have a completely different-oh, what’s the word I’m trying to think of-aura, I guess. Even the tone of your voice is different,” explained Lauren. “It is so cute! You two have to get together.”
If only...
“Yeah, well I am with Ron and he is with Katie,” said Stacy.
“About that,” said Lauren curiously. “Have you decided what you are going to do?”
“No, not yet,” answered Stacy.
“Well give it time. It will come to you,” said Lauren. “But if you do feel that strongly about Joel, then it isn’t really fair, you know?”
“Yeah, I know,” said Stacy, starting to get lost in her thoughts. “It is just complicated.”
“Do you want to go out?” asked Lauren. “We were going to go home, but you seem like you need to get out of your apartment.”
“I was just going to stay in, but you are right,” said Stacy. “I need to get out.”
“Ok we will pick you up in about fifteen minutes,” said Lauren.
The truth is, I do need to get out of this apartment. I need to go out with my friends so I can have fun and just forget about everything. The longer I sit here, the more I will torture myself about Joel.
When Lauren and Brian arrived, Stacy was waiting downstairs. She was eager to have a carefree night. The three of them decided on Stratler’s, having no idea that Joel, Katie, John, and Tiffany had also chose to go there.
“Thanks guys,” said Stacy, sitting in the backseat of Brian’s mustang.
“Anytime,” said Brian, looking at Stacy through his rearview mirror.
Upon coming down the street that passed right in front of Stratler’s, Brian saw Joel’s Charger in front of them. It was heading away from the bar.
“That’s Joel’s car,” said Brian.
“It is, isn’t it?” asked Lauren rhetorically.
“They are heading home early,” said Brian.
“That’s not like them,” said Lauren. “I wonder if something happened.”
As we came to find out at a later time, Joel and Katie had an argument and that she had stormed out on him. I feel bad when I think about it because I felt relieved that they had left. One of the things that I was trying not to think about on this evening was the way I had felt recently when I saw the two of them together. Little did I know, those feelings would soon be nothing more than a distant memory after what was about to happen.
Stacy, Lauren, and Brian entered Stratler’s and elected to sit at a table rather than a booth. They were forced to wait a few minutes before the waitress came over to greet them. The three of them ordered drinks, Brian a beer and the two girls ordered martinis. Brian was hungry, so he put in an order for cheese fries.
The three of them received their drinks and sat there talking about nothing important at all, which is the way Stacy wanted it. Knowing that this trip was solely to get Stacy’s mind off of her troubles, Lauren and Brian also veered away from any potential topics that would lead her mind back to those thoughts.
After drinking three martinis, the girls took a trip to the restroom, leaving Brian alone with his cheese fries. While eating, Brian looked around at the other patrons, just checking out his surroundings. Shortly after, the front door opened and in walked three men and four girls. One of the men was Ron.
When Ron saw Brian, he looked as if he were a deer caught in the stream of headlights. His eyes widened as his face slowly became pale. He turned and said something to one of his friends and left them standing at the door as he started toward Brian. Unaware that Ron told Stacy that he was working, Brian assumed the Ron had come to join them.
“Hey Ron.” said Brian. “The girls are in the bathroom. They should be out in a minute or so.”
“Brian, this isn’t how it looks,” said Ron.
“What do you mean?” asked Brian.
“Well, uh,” said Ron, before pausing. “Stacy thinks that I am working.”
“Oh,” said Brian, putting the pieces together.
“Yeah,” said Ron, running his hand through his hair. “I gotta get out of here, but you can’t tell Stacy I was here.”
“Do what now?” asked Brian.
“We are guys, Brian,” said Ron arrogantly. “We have to stick together.”
“Um, okay,” said Brian, not sure what to think about this new side of Ron that he had never seen before.
“I’m serious, Brian,” said Ron sternly.
“Whatever you say, Ron,” said Brian, “but it doesn’t look like I will have to keep your secret after all.”
Ron then turned around to see Stacy and Lauren standing behind him. Stacy was looking at him with a confused look on her face. “Ron?” she asked. “I thought you had to work?”
“Well, I,” said Ron, not sure what to say. His awkward pause was then followed by a long silence.
“So you lied?” asked Stacy.
Ron sighed and hung his head. He looked like a boy who was being scolded in school. “I’m sorry, baby.”
“Save it, Ron,” said Stacy angrily. She then turned and ran out of Stratler’s.
Lauren glared at Ron, then turned and followed Stacy. Ron took a deep breath and let it escape his lips as he hung his head once again. He then turned toward Brian. He left a wad of cash on the table that would cover the bill and tip. He then started toward the door, thus walking toward Ron.
“That sucks,” said Brian as he walked past Ron.
Ron was angered by the comment, but he did not respond to Brian in any way. Instead, he stood there staring out of Stratler’s front window in the direction that Stacy had gone.
And just like that, my carefree evening was ruined. I was so angry at that point that I did not even know what to do. Now that I think about it, I don’t know why I didn’t just break-up with him right then and there like any sane human being would have done. The truth is, I knew that I was in a toxic relationship, but why could I not just end it? Am I that big of a mess?
Unfortunately, he did not feel that way. Every time we were out and Joel was not coming or had not gotten there yet, all he did was talk about his disdain for Joel and his actions. Sometimes I wonder what it is like to be someone who is completely detached from reality. Then, I am very thankful that I am not like Dustin.
It was Friday night and Ron was at work. Joel had invited me to go with him, Katie, John, Tiffany, Lauren, and Brian to the movies, but I declined. That feeling that hit me the night that Joel and Dustin got into it was still lingering. It was hard to be around Joel and Katie when they were together. I do not know what the deal is. Maybe I am jealous.
So there I sat, in my apartment alone with a bottle of wine, watching some movies.
Stacy sat on her couched, curled up in a blanket. All that was exposed was her head and her hand, which held a glass of wine. She was staring intently at her television. She had just finished her first movie and got up to pop some popcorn for the second at nine fifteen when her cell phone rang.
“Hey, Lauren,” said Stacy, putting her phone to her ear.
“Hey girl,” said Lauren. “Why didn’t you come to the movie?” Stacy hesitated and before she could say anything, Lauren said, “It’s because of Joel and Katie right?”
“Yeah,” answered Stacy. “Hey wait a minute, aren’t you with Brian?”
“Yeah,” replied Lauren. “You should know by now that I tell him everything. He won’t say anything.”
“Fair enough,” said Stacy.
“Girl, you were right,” said Lauren. “Joel is wearing off on you. You just said ‘fair enough’ again.”
“Darnit!” said Stacy. “I made the mistake of saying it in front of him and I never thought I would hear the end of it. I told him that it wasn’t going to happen.”
“Awww, you are so cute!” said Lauren semi-excitedly.
“What do you mean?” asked Stacy.
“When you talk about Joel, you just have a completely different-oh, what’s the word I’m trying to think of-aura, I guess. Even the tone of your voice is different,” explained Lauren. “It is so cute! You two have to get together.”
If only...
“Yeah, well I am with Ron and he is with Katie,” said Stacy.
“About that,” said Lauren curiously. “Have you decided what you are going to do?”
“No, not yet,” answered Stacy.
“Well give it time. It will come to you,” said Lauren. “But if you do feel that strongly about Joel, then it isn’t really fair, you know?”
“Yeah, I know,” said Stacy, starting to get lost in her thoughts. “It is just complicated.”
“Do you want to go out?” asked Lauren. “We were going to go home, but you seem like you need to get out of your apartment.”
“I was just going to stay in, but you are right,” said Stacy. “I need to get out.”
“Ok we will pick you up in about fifteen minutes,” said Lauren.
The truth is, I do need to get out of this apartment. I need to go out with my friends so I can have fun and just forget about everything. The longer I sit here, the more I will torture myself about Joel.
When Lauren and Brian arrived, Stacy was waiting downstairs. She was eager to have a carefree night. The three of them decided on Stratler’s, having no idea that Joel, Katie, John, and Tiffany had also chose to go there.
“Thanks guys,” said Stacy, sitting in the backseat of Brian’s mustang.
“Anytime,” said Brian, looking at Stacy through his rearview mirror.
Upon coming down the street that passed right in front of Stratler’s, Brian saw Joel’s Charger in front of them. It was heading away from the bar.
“That’s Joel’s car,” said Brian.
“It is, isn’t it?” asked Lauren rhetorically.
“They are heading home early,” said Brian.
“That’s not like them,” said Lauren. “I wonder if something happened.”
As we came to find out at a later time, Joel and Katie had an argument and that she had stormed out on him. I feel bad when I think about it because I felt relieved that they had left. One of the things that I was trying not to think about on this evening was the way I had felt recently when I saw the two of them together. Little did I know, those feelings would soon be nothing more than a distant memory after what was about to happen.
Stacy, Lauren, and Brian entered Stratler’s and elected to sit at a table rather than a booth. They were forced to wait a few minutes before the waitress came over to greet them. The three of them ordered drinks, Brian a beer and the two girls ordered martinis. Brian was hungry, so he put in an order for cheese fries.
The three of them received their drinks and sat there talking about nothing important at all, which is the way Stacy wanted it. Knowing that this trip was solely to get Stacy’s mind off of her troubles, Lauren and Brian also veered away from any potential topics that would lead her mind back to those thoughts.
After drinking three martinis, the girls took a trip to the restroom, leaving Brian alone with his cheese fries. While eating, Brian looked around at the other patrons, just checking out his surroundings. Shortly after, the front door opened and in walked three men and four girls. One of the men was Ron.
When Ron saw Brian, he looked as if he were a deer caught in the stream of headlights. His eyes widened as his face slowly became pale. He turned and said something to one of his friends and left them standing at the door as he started toward Brian. Unaware that Ron told Stacy that he was working, Brian assumed the Ron had come to join them.
“Hey Ron.” said Brian. “The girls are in the bathroom. They should be out in a minute or so.”
“Brian, this isn’t how it looks,” said Ron.
“What do you mean?” asked Brian.
“Well, uh,” said Ron, before pausing. “Stacy thinks that I am working.”
“Oh,” said Brian, putting the pieces together.
“Yeah,” said Ron, running his hand through his hair. “I gotta get out of here, but you can’t tell Stacy I was here.”
“Do what now?” asked Brian.
“We are guys, Brian,” said Ron arrogantly. “We have to stick together.”
“Um, okay,” said Brian, not sure what to think about this new side of Ron that he had never seen before.
“I’m serious, Brian,” said Ron sternly.
“Whatever you say, Ron,” said Brian, “but it doesn’t look like I will have to keep your secret after all.”
Ron then turned around to see Stacy and Lauren standing behind him. Stacy was looking at him with a confused look on her face. “Ron?” she asked. “I thought you had to work?”
“Well, I,” said Ron, not sure what to say. His awkward pause was then followed by a long silence.
“So you lied?” asked Stacy.
Ron sighed and hung his head. He looked like a boy who was being scolded in school. “I’m sorry, baby.”
“Save it, Ron,” said Stacy angrily. She then turned and ran out of Stratler’s.
Lauren glared at Ron, then turned and followed Stacy. Ron took a deep breath and let it escape his lips as he hung his head once again. He then turned toward Brian. He left a wad of cash on the table that would cover the bill and tip. He then started toward the door, thus walking toward Ron.
“That sucks,” said Brian as he walked past Ron.
Ron was angered by the comment, but he did not respond to Brian in any way. Instead, he stood there staring out of Stratler’s front window in the direction that Stacy had gone.
And just like that, my carefree evening was ruined. I was so angry at that point that I did not even know what to do. Now that I think about it, I don’t know why I didn’t just break-up with him right then and there like any sane human being would have done. The truth is, I knew that I was in a toxic relationship, but why could I not just end it? Am I that big of a mess?
Monday, April 14, 2008
Episode 12: Unbelievable
It has been a couple of weeks since I came to the realization that Joel and I were always going to be just friends and that I was going to be happy for him no matter what. He has been dating Katie since then and I am genuinely happy for him. It was hard at first, but I eventually put my feelings aside. Needless to say, our friendship has never been better.
Not just that, but my relationship with Ron has gotten a lot better. He has been putting forth the extra effort lately and it has made a world of difference. Our relationship almost has the feel of a new relationship. It has been really nice.
Actually the group as a whole has really been clicking lately. That is why what happened next was so bizarre.
It was Tuesday evening, fifteen minutes before six, when Stacy walked into her apartment to change clothes before heading off to Stratler’s to meet her friends. Ron had called and was a few minutes away from her apartment building, so Stacy would have to be hasty. As Stacy was getting ready, her phone rang.
Seeing that it was Lauren, Stacy flipped her phone open and said, “Hey girl, what’s up?”
“Nothing, much,” answered Lauren. “Just getting ready to leave to go to Stratler’s. You are coming right?”
“Yeah,” answered Stacy, “just waiting on Ron to get here.”
“Yeah, I am waiting on Dustin,” replied Lauren.
“You are riding with Dustin?” asked Stacy.
“Yeah, Brian is already there and Dustin offered to swing by and get me since its on the way,” answered Lauren.
“That is surprisingly nice and not in any way obnoxious,” said Stacy. “That isn’t like him.”
“Yeah,” said Lauren, “tell me about it. Very uncharacteristic of him.”
“Maybe he has changed,” said Stacy, pausing to hear Lauren’s reaction. As Lauren started laughing, so did Stacy.
“Yeah right,” said Lauren. “That would be the day.”
Stacy then heard a beep in her ear and lowered her phone to gaze at the screen. Ron’s name came across the screen. Putting the phone back up to her ear she said, “That’s Ron calling. I’ll see you up there.”
“Ok, bye girl,” said Lauren.
Ron let Stacy know that he was almost there, so Stacy finished getting ready and awaited his arrival. Once he picked her up, the two of them headed for Stratler’s, arriving just after everyone else.
As I sat down at the full table with Ron, Joel, Katie, John, Tiffany, Jack, Brian, Lauren, and Dustin. I caught sight of Joel and Katie. I had seen the two of them together before, but for some reason, when I saw them on this evening, it struck me the wrong way. I quickly brushed the uncomfortable feeling and began to enjoy the evening with my friends.
We sat there as we usually did, drinking and having a good time, but the more I watched Joel and Katie, the more I felt uneasy. It felt kind of like jealousy, but why would I feel that way? I was happy for Joel. Again and again I tried to bury the feeling without success. I did finally forget about it, but only after the incident.
It happened a little over an hour and a half after I had gotten there. Ron had to work the night shift, so he was already gone. Brian and Lauren had gone home as well. Joel and Jack had gotten up to buy the next round of drinks, leaving John, his girlfriend Tiffany, Katie, Dustin, and myself sitting at the table. Dustin scooted over and was talking to Katie. It started off as small talk, but then quickly took a turn for the worse. It was when he started speaking quietly and trying to be discreet when I started listening.
“So, how are things going with Joel?” asked Dustin.
“Good so far,” answered Katie.
What is he up to? It was right then that I nudged John so that he would hear it too.
Stacy tapped John, who was sitting right beside her, a few times with her elbow to get his attention. When John looked at her, she motioned her head toward Dustin.
“Well, uh, if it doesn’t work out with the two of you, you should give me a call,” said Dustin.
Oh my God! Did he really just say that? Who would do that to their friend?
Katie, who was taken back by what Dustin had just said, said nothing. Instead, she gave him a weird look and nodded awkwardly.
Stacy leaned over to John, who was growing angry, and asked, “Should we tell Joel?”
“Well hell yeah we should,” said John. He then stood up and began walking over to where Joel stood at the bar; Stacy was right behind him.
“Dude,” said John, nudging Joel. “Dustin is hitting on Katie.”
“Do what now?” asked Joel, turning around.
“Yeah, he did,” said Stacy. “I heard it too.”
I felt bad adding fuel to the fire, but Joel deserved to know.
An angry look came over Joel’s face as he started toward the table. However, Jack stopped him by placing his hand on Joel’s shoulder before he could take more than two strides away from the bar.
“Hold on man,” said Jack. “What are you going to do?”
“I’ll tell you what I’d like to do,” said Joel angrily, then stopping himself. “I am tired of him doing stuff like this.”
“You know how he is,” said Jack, trying to calm Joel down. “He does this kind of stuff to me all the time and it makes me mad too. You just have to let it go.”
“On more than one occasion, I have been talking to a girl when we go out and he just comes over and cuts me off in mid-sentence by literally getting in the middle of us,” said Joel, seemingly growing angrier by the second. “Both times that happened, I was ready to say something to him, but you would tell me what you just did: ‘That is just how he is, it makes me mad too, just let it go.’ Well, I am not going to let it go this time, Jack. You may not want to stand up to him, but I sure as hell will.”
John and Stacy watched on silently, nodding in agreement as Joel stated his case to Jack.
I have no idea why Jack was defending Dustin, but good for Joel for not backing down. I do not blame him one bit for being angry. I would be too if I were him.
“Dude, come on,” said Jack. “Don’t make a big deal about this.”
“It is a big deal, Jack!” argued Joel, practically yelling at this point. “He is hitting on my girlfriend. Besides, if no one ever says anything to him, then he will just keep doing stuff like this.”
“We are all friends here, Joel,” said Jack. “He wouldn’t do anything like that intentionally.”
“Friends don’t do that and obviously he would do something like this intentionally because he just did it,” said Joel sternly, turning back toward the table.
The way Jack was defending Dustin was really bugging me. It just did not sit right with me. It really made me question his character. From that day on I was definitely wary of Dustin, but also a little so about Jack as well.
It was at that time that Kaite looked over at Joel with a disgusted look on her face. Joel saw this and motioned for her to come over. As she stood and walked over to where he was, Joel asked Jack, John, and Stacy if he could talk to her alone. The three of them agreed and returned to the table.
When I got back to the table I sat down across from Dustin, who had a smug grin on his face. He looked to be so proud of himself. However, I did not pay much attention to him because not long after, Joel came marching over to the table to confront Dustin.
Upon arriving at the table, Joel stood across from Dustin and asked, “What do you think you are doing?”
“What are you talking about?” asked Dustin, a look of confusion came over his face.
Not only did Dustin’s arrogance make Joel angrier, it made me mad as well.
“You know exactly what I am talking about,” said Joel, almost shouting. “Do you really think it is ok to hit on my girlfriend?”
“I didn’t hit on your girlfriend,” said Dustin defensively.
What a liar! My disdain for Dustin was growing with each passing second.
“Oh, so you didn’t say that if it doesn’t work out between me and he that she should call you?” asked Joel. “You didn’t say that she should be with a guy like you instead of me?”
“No,” responded Dustin, offended by the accusations.
“You are unbelievable!” shouted Joel.
“You were obviously lied to,” said Dustin smugly.
“Yeah, I have been lied to,” said Joel calmly, “by you. Because three people would not all fabricate the same exact story.”
“Man, forget this,” said Dustin, standing and grabbing his coat. “I’m leaving.”
“That’s what I thought,” said Joel. “Deny it til the end and run away like you always do. And by the way, don’t talk to Katie anymore.”
“You don’t have to worry about that,” responded Dustin angrily. He then put on his coat and left Stratler’s.
After Dustin left, everyone sat quietly just watching Joel. After a while things returned to normal, but the tension was still there and understandably so. Dustin was way out of line with what he did. Who does that to a friend? You think you know someone, then they go and do something like that. Unbelieveable...
Not just that, but my relationship with Ron has gotten a lot better. He has been putting forth the extra effort lately and it has made a world of difference. Our relationship almost has the feel of a new relationship. It has been really nice.
Actually the group as a whole has really been clicking lately. That is why what happened next was so bizarre.
It was Tuesday evening, fifteen minutes before six, when Stacy walked into her apartment to change clothes before heading off to Stratler’s to meet her friends. Ron had called and was a few minutes away from her apartment building, so Stacy would have to be hasty. As Stacy was getting ready, her phone rang.
Seeing that it was Lauren, Stacy flipped her phone open and said, “Hey girl, what’s up?”
“Nothing, much,” answered Lauren. “Just getting ready to leave to go to Stratler’s. You are coming right?”
“Yeah,” answered Stacy, “just waiting on Ron to get here.”
“Yeah, I am waiting on Dustin,” replied Lauren.
“You are riding with Dustin?” asked Stacy.
“Yeah, Brian is already there and Dustin offered to swing by and get me since its on the way,” answered Lauren.
“That is surprisingly nice and not in any way obnoxious,” said Stacy. “That isn’t like him.”
“Yeah,” said Lauren, “tell me about it. Very uncharacteristic of him.”
“Maybe he has changed,” said Stacy, pausing to hear Lauren’s reaction. As Lauren started laughing, so did Stacy.
“Yeah right,” said Lauren. “That would be the day.”
Stacy then heard a beep in her ear and lowered her phone to gaze at the screen. Ron’s name came across the screen. Putting the phone back up to her ear she said, “That’s Ron calling. I’ll see you up there.”
“Ok, bye girl,” said Lauren.
Ron let Stacy know that he was almost there, so Stacy finished getting ready and awaited his arrival. Once he picked her up, the two of them headed for Stratler’s, arriving just after everyone else.
As I sat down at the full table with Ron, Joel, Katie, John, Tiffany, Jack, Brian, Lauren, and Dustin. I caught sight of Joel and Katie. I had seen the two of them together before, but for some reason, when I saw them on this evening, it struck me the wrong way. I quickly brushed the uncomfortable feeling and began to enjoy the evening with my friends.
We sat there as we usually did, drinking and having a good time, but the more I watched Joel and Katie, the more I felt uneasy. It felt kind of like jealousy, but why would I feel that way? I was happy for Joel. Again and again I tried to bury the feeling without success. I did finally forget about it, but only after the incident.
It happened a little over an hour and a half after I had gotten there. Ron had to work the night shift, so he was already gone. Brian and Lauren had gone home as well. Joel and Jack had gotten up to buy the next round of drinks, leaving John, his girlfriend Tiffany, Katie, Dustin, and myself sitting at the table. Dustin scooted over and was talking to Katie. It started off as small talk, but then quickly took a turn for the worse. It was when he started speaking quietly and trying to be discreet when I started listening.
“So, how are things going with Joel?” asked Dustin.
“Good so far,” answered Katie.
What is he up to? It was right then that I nudged John so that he would hear it too.
Stacy tapped John, who was sitting right beside her, a few times with her elbow to get his attention. When John looked at her, she motioned her head toward Dustin.
“Well, uh, if it doesn’t work out with the two of you, you should give me a call,” said Dustin.
Oh my God! Did he really just say that? Who would do that to their friend?
Katie, who was taken back by what Dustin had just said, said nothing. Instead, she gave him a weird look and nodded awkwardly.
Stacy leaned over to John, who was growing angry, and asked, “Should we tell Joel?”
“Well hell yeah we should,” said John. He then stood up and began walking over to where Joel stood at the bar; Stacy was right behind him.
“Dude,” said John, nudging Joel. “Dustin is hitting on Katie.”
“Do what now?” asked Joel, turning around.
“Yeah, he did,” said Stacy. “I heard it too.”
I felt bad adding fuel to the fire, but Joel deserved to know.
An angry look came over Joel’s face as he started toward the table. However, Jack stopped him by placing his hand on Joel’s shoulder before he could take more than two strides away from the bar.
“Hold on man,” said Jack. “What are you going to do?”
“I’ll tell you what I’d like to do,” said Joel angrily, then stopping himself. “I am tired of him doing stuff like this.”
“You know how he is,” said Jack, trying to calm Joel down. “He does this kind of stuff to me all the time and it makes me mad too. You just have to let it go.”
“On more than one occasion, I have been talking to a girl when we go out and he just comes over and cuts me off in mid-sentence by literally getting in the middle of us,” said Joel, seemingly growing angrier by the second. “Both times that happened, I was ready to say something to him, but you would tell me what you just did: ‘That is just how he is, it makes me mad too, just let it go.’ Well, I am not going to let it go this time, Jack. You may not want to stand up to him, but I sure as hell will.”
John and Stacy watched on silently, nodding in agreement as Joel stated his case to Jack.
I have no idea why Jack was defending Dustin, but good for Joel for not backing down. I do not blame him one bit for being angry. I would be too if I were him.
“Dude, come on,” said Jack. “Don’t make a big deal about this.”
“It is a big deal, Jack!” argued Joel, practically yelling at this point. “He is hitting on my girlfriend. Besides, if no one ever says anything to him, then he will just keep doing stuff like this.”
“We are all friends here, Joel,” said Jack. “He wouldn’t do anything like that intentionally.”
“Friends don’t do that and obviously he would do something like this intentionally because he just did it,” said Joel sternly, turning back toward the table.
The way Jack was defending Dustin was really bugging me. It just did not sit right with me. It really made me question his character. From that day on I was definitely wary of Dustin, but also a little so about Jack as well.
It was at that time that Kaite looked over at Joel with a disgusted look on her face. Joel saw this and motioned for her to come over. As she stood and walked over to where he was, Joel asked Jack, John, and Stacy if he could talk to her alone. The three of them agreed and returned to the table.
When I got back to the table I sat down across from Dustin, who had a smug grin on his face. He looked to be so proud of himself. However, I did not pay much attention to him because not long after, Joel came marching over to the table to confront Dustin.
Upon arriving at the table, Joel stood across from Dustin and asked, “What do you think you are doing?”
“What are you talking about?” asked Dustin, a look of confusion came over his face.
Not only did Dustin’s arrogance make Joel angrier, it made me mad as well.
“You know exactly what I am talking about,” said Joel, almost shouting. “Do you really think it is ok to hit on my girlfriend?”
“I didn’t hit on your girlfriend,” said Dustin defensively.
What a liar! My disdain for Dustin was growing with each passing second.
“Oh, so you didn’t say that if it doesn’t work out between me and he that she should call you?” asked Joel. “You didn’t say that she should be with a guy like you instead of me?”
“No,” responded Dustin, offended by the accusations.
“You are unbelievable!” shouted Joel.
“You were obviously lied to,” said Dustin smugly.
“Yeah, I have been lied to,” said Joel calmly, “by you. Because three people would not all fabricate the same exact story.”
“Man, forget this,” said Dustin, standing and grabbing his coat. “I’m leaving.”
“That’s what I thought,” said Joel. “Deny it til the end and run away like you always do. And by the way, don’t talk to Katie anymore.”
“You don’t have to worry about that,” responded Dustin angrily. He then put on his coat and left Stratler’s.
After Dustin left, everyone sat quietly just watching Joel. After a while things returned to normal, but the tension was still there and understandably so. Dustin was way out of line with what he did. Who does that to a friend? You think you know someone, then they go and do something like that. Unbelieveable...
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Are You Serious??
So, a man in Georgia robbed a convenient store. No big deal right? Wrong. Prior to robbing the store, the guy filled out an application, filling in his real name and phone number, and left it behind. That's right: HE LEFT IT BEHIND!
Is it me or are people getting more and more stupid everyday?
How can you possibly be that dumb? At least write the wrong name. Not only that, but the guy lived in the apartment complex right next door. The best part about this is, there is a video of the whole thing floating around on the internet. Priceless...
Is it me or are people getting more and more stupid everyday?
How can you possibly be that dumb? At least write the wrong name. Not only that, but the guy lived in the apartment complex right next door. The best part about this is, there is a video of the whole thing floating around on the internet. Priceless...
Monday, April 7, 2008
Episode 11: Just Friends
I know that not telling Joel how I feel was the right decision. I have a boyfriend and I do not think that he feels the same way about me. Besides, I wouldn’t want anything to ruin our friendship. So if it was the right decision then why do I feel so horrible? It happened three days ago and I still cannot shake off this wretched feeling. Joel had not showed up at Stratler’s for the past few days either, which made it a little easier considering the weird moment we had outside of my apartment.
After the feeling the night had took on from our conversation during our walk home, the end of it was a train wreck. I just hope that I wasn’t the reason that Joel was shying away from Stratler’s. I wish I could see him just so I would know that everything was alright between us.
Anyway, it’s Friday night and Ron, Brian, Lauren, and myself decided to go out on a double date. Lauren and I have become pretty close since she started dating Brian and joined our group. I really enjoy going off with her seeing as how we are the only two girls in the group other than the ones the boys date. Some of them are actually pretty cool-I say actually because the guys don’t have a good track record as far as choosing girls goes-and Lauren and I try to befriend them even after the break-ups, but none of them stick, so the two of us have to stick together.
Stacy had not been home long before her cell phone started ringing. Each time her phone rang, Stacy leapt up and dashed over in hopes that it was Joel, thus signifying that everything between them was ok, but it was not. The first call she got was from Lauren to decide where they wanted to eat. Then next call was from Ron to find out what time he should pick her up.
After getting partially ready, Stacy decided to just call Joel. She picked up her cell phone and scrolled through her numbers. Upon coming to Joel’s name she paused, thus highlighting his name and number, but did not hit the green call button. After staring at the screen of her phone for a moment, she flipped the top part down, closing the phone. She held it in her hand as she paced around her apartment.
I can’t just call him for no reason. What could I call about? To see what he is doing tonight? No, I can’t do that because we already have plans. To see why he hasn’t been at Stratler’s? No, I don’t want to seem to needy. Just forget it...
Stacy paused momentarily and placed the phone on her coffee table. She then continued on to her room where she returned to getting ready for the night ahead. After she was ready, she walked into the kitchen area of her apartment and reached up and pulled a bottle of wine off of the top of the refrigerator. After retrieving a wine glass from one of the cabinets, she took the bottle of wine into the living room and sat on the couch.
She poured a glass of wine then turned on the television. After flipping through some channels, she determined that she was not in the mood for TV, so she sat there and sipped on her wine attempting to get lost in her thoughts while waiting for Ron to come pick her up.
After two glasses of wine, Stacy had accrued a small buzz. She had only planned on having one glass, but upon inspecting the clock after her first glass, she had discovered that Ron was twenty minutes late. Frustrated, she decided to have another glass. Another ten minutes passed, which made Ron thirty minutes late, when Stacy got a call from Lauren.
Flipping her phone open, Stacy said, “Hello.”
“Hey girl,” said Lauren. “Are you on your way?”
“No,” answered Stacy, taking in and letting out a deep breath. “Ron is late yet again.”
“Again?” asked Lauren.
“Yep,” said Stacy, obviously irritated.
“Do you want us to come get you?” asked Lauren.
“No,” replied Stacy, “I might just stay in if he does not show up in the next twenty minutes or so, but thanks for offering.”
“You have to come out,” protested Lauren.
Before Stacy could answer, there was a knock at her door. She told Lauren to hang on as she rose from the couch and walked over to the door. She looked through the peep hole to see Ron standing on the other side. She brought her phone back up to her ear as she turned the deadbolt and opened the door.
“He finally decided to show up,” said Stacy to Lauren as she glared at Ron.
“Ok,” replied Lauren. “See you in a bit.”
“Ok, bye,” answered Stacy. She then hung up her phone and turned away from Ron. She walked over to her bottle of wine, put the cork back into the opening at the top, picked it up, and started toward the kitchen.
“Not going to say hey?” asked Ron, watching Stacy walk to the kitchen and set her glass in the sink and then return the wine bottle to the top of the refrigerator.
“You’re late,” said Stacy bluntly, not looking at Ron as she walked to her room. She returned a short time later with her purse. “I would just say that I am not going to go out, but Lauren really wants to hang out and I would not leave her hanging.”
“I am sorry-“ started Ron before getting cut off by Stacy.
“Save it,” interrupted Stacy. “I should be accustomed to you being late by now, but for some reason I keep thinking that maybe, just maybe, you will actually show up on time for once.”
“Is it that big of a deal?” asked Ron nonchalantly.
“Actually,” answered Stacy, growing angrier, “it is, because it just shows how selfish you are.”
Ron let out a sigh. “Can we just go?”
“Gladly,” said Stacy as she walked by Ron and out the door. She stood there and waited for him to exit, then locked the door and the two of them were off.
Ron tried to talk to Stacy during their car trip to the restaurant where they would be meeting Brian and Lauren, but Stacy ignored him as she stared out the window. Ron finally gave up and turned the music up in order to fill the silence.
When the two arrived at the restaurant, they exited the car and walked in. They walked past the hostess and into the dining area, looking for Brian and Lauren. Upon finding them, they walked over and sat down at the table.
“Hey guys,” said Lauren with a smile. “You made it.”
“Sorry we are late,” replied Stacy.
“It’s fine,” said Lauren. “I am just glad that you are here.”
And with that, Stacy’s anger melted away as she got lost in a conversation with Lauren. Soon after, Brian and Ron engaged in their own conversation as the four of them enjoyed dinner.
As the night continued, my anger toward Ron eventually faded and I started to have a good time. However, my thoughts kept drifting back to Joel. I could not help but replay the other night’s events over and over in my mind. I wonder what he is doing right now?
After dinner, the four of them went back to Brian and Dustin’s apartment to watch a movie and hangout. As the night wore on, it did not get any easier for Stacy, whose thoughts continued to consist of Joel. The overwhelming, nagging feeling she had that there was something wrong between the two of them only continued to grow. Finally she decided that she needed to see him. She had to talk to him to see once and for all that nothing was wrong.
After indiscreetly prompting Brian to text Dustin and find out where they were, she suggested that they go out. Brian and Lauren turned down the invite, but Ron was more than willing to go. When Stacy and Ron left Brian’s apartment, they headed downtown toward the Dirty Sanchez.
Stacy found herself more and more anxious to reach downtown the closer her and Ron got. As usual, Ron dropped Stacy off in front of the bar so that she would not have to walk and drove off to find a parking spot. Stacy showed her licence to the doorman and traversed the front door. When Stacy walked through the door of the Dirty Sanchez, she immediately caught sight of Joel standing alone by the bar.
He looked so sad standing there by himself. I just wanted to hug him. Then, out of nowhere, a dark-haired girl walked over to him and tapped him on the shoulder. I watched them for a few minutes, waiting for an opening to approach Joel, but it never came. They seemed to hit it off really well.
Then, as I continued to watch them, my heart dropped. It was like he had forgotten that I even existed. Actually, I don’t know why I was thinking that. It’s not like I made myself available to him, or that I was even available in the first place. I guess I just thought...no, never mind; it doesn’t matter now.
Before Ron could walk in, Stacy turned and walked out of the Dirty Sanchez.
“I don’t feel so well,” said Stacy. “Can we go?”
Ron was confused, but seeing as how he was already on thin ice for being late earlier that night, he decided not to press the issue. “Ok,” he said.
On the way home, Stacy was deep in thought.
She doesn’t deserve him. Hmph, what am I saying? Neither do I. Wait, why am I acting like this? It was right then, that I decided that I was going to be happy for Joel. I just wanted him to be happy even if that is something that I could not offer him. He deserves to be happy... even if it makes me miserable. I guess I am just going to have to accept the fact that we are always going to be just friends.
After the feeling the night had took on from our conversation during our walk home, the end of it was a train wreck. I just hope that I wasn’t the reason that Joel was shying away from Stratler’s. I wish I could see him just so I would know that everything was alright between us.
Anyway, it’s Friday night and Ron, Brian, Lauren, and myself decided to go out on a double date. Lauren and I have become pretty close since she started dating Brian and joined our group. I really enjoy going off with her seeing as how we are the only two girls in the group other than the ones the boys date. Some of them are actually pretty cool-I say actually because the guys don’t have a good track record as far as choosing girls goes-and Lauren and I try to befriend them even after the break-ups, but none of them stick, so the two of us have to stick together.
Stacy had not been home long before her cell phone started ringing. Each time her phone rang, Stacy leapt up and dashed over in hopes that it was Joel, thus signifying that everything between them was ok, but it was not. The first call she got was from Lauren to decide where they wanted to eat. Then next call was from Ron to find out what time he should pick her up.
After getting partially ready, Stacy decided to just call Joel. She picked up her cell phone and scrolled through her numbers. Upon coming to Joel’s name she paused, thus highlighting his name and number, but did not hit the green call button. After staring at the screen of her phone for a moment, she flipped the top part down, closing the phone. She held it in her hand as she paced around her apartment.
I can’t just call him for no reason. What could I call about? To see what he is doing tonight? No, I can’t do that because we already have plans. To see why he hasn’t been at Stratler’s? No, I don’t want to seem to needy. Just forget it...
Stacy paused momentarily and placed the phone on her coffee table. She then continued on to her room where she returned to getting ready for the night ahead. After she was ready, she walked into the kitchen area of her apartment and reached up and pulled a bottle of wine off of the top of the refrigerator. After retrieving a wine glass from one of the cabinets, she took the bottle of wine into the living room and sat on the couch.
She poured a glass of wine then turned on the television. After flipping through some channels, she determined that she was not in the mood for TV, so she sat there and sipped on her wine attempting to get lost in her thoughts while waiting for Ron to come pick her up.
After two glasses of wine, Stacy had accrued a small buzz. She had only planned on having one glass, but upon inspecting the clock after her first glass, she had discovered that Ron was twenty minutes late. Frustrated, she decided to have another glass. Another ten minutes passed, which made Ron thirty minutes late, when Stacy got a call from Lauren.
Flipping her phone open, Stacy said, “Hello.”
“Hey girl,” said Lauren. “Are you on your way?”
“No,” answered Stacy, taking in and letting out a deep breath. “Ron is late yet again.”
“Again?” asked Lauren.
“Yep,” said Stacy, obviously irritated.
“Do you want us to come get you?” asked Lauren.
“No,” replied Stacy, “I might just stay in if he does not show up in the next twenty minutes or so, but thanks for offering.”
“You have to come out,” protested Lauren.
Before Stacy could answer, there was a knock at her door. She told Lauren to hang on as she rose from the couch and walked over to the door. She looked through the peep hole to see Ron standing on the other side. She brought her phone back up to her ear as she turned the deadbolt and opened the door.
“He finally decided to show up,” said Stacy to Lauren as she glared at Ron.
“Ok,” replied Lauren. “See you in a bit.”
“Ok, bye,” answered Stacy. She then hung up her phone and turned away from Ron. She walked over to her bottle of wine, put the cork back into the opening at the top, picked it up, and started toward the kitchen.
“Not going to say hey?” asked Ron, watching Stacy walk to the kitchen and set her glass in the sink and then return the wine bottle to the top of the refrigerator.
“You’re late,” said Stacy bluntly, not looking at Ron as she walked to her room. She returned a short time later with her purse. “I would just say that I am not going to go out, but Lauren really wants to hang out and I would not leave her hanging.”
“I am sorry-“ started Ron before getting cut off by Stacy.
“Save it,” interrupted Stacy. “I should be accustomed to you being late by now, but for some reason I keep thinking that maybe, just maybe, you will actually show up on time for once.”
“Is it that big of a deal?” asked Ron nonchalantly.
“Actually,” answered Stacy, growing angrier, “it is, because it just shows how selfish you are.”
Ron let out a sigh. “Can we just go?”
“Gladly,” said Stacy as she walked by Ron and out the door. She stood there and waited for him to exit, then locked the door and the two of them were off.
Ron tried to talk to Stacy during their car trip to the restaurant where they would be meeting Brian and Lauren, but Stacy ignored him as she stared out the window. Ron finally gave up and turned the music up in order to fill the silence.
When the two arrived at the restaurant, they exited the car and walked in. They walked past the hostess and into the dining area, looking for Brian and Lauren. Upon finding them, they walked over and sat down at the table.
“Hey guys,” said Lauren with a smile. “You made it.”
“Sorry we are late,” replied Stacy.
“It’s fine,” said Lauren. “I am just glad that you are here.”
And with that, Stacy’s anger melted away as she got lost in a conversation with Lauren. Soon after, Brian and Ron engaged in their own conversation as the four of them enjoyed dinner.
As the night continued, my anger toward Ron eventually faded and I started to have a good time. However, my thoughts kept drifting back to Joel. I could not help but replay the other night’s events over and over in my mind. I wonder what he is doing right now?
After dinner, the four of them went back to Brian and Dustin’s apartment to watch a movie and hangout. As the night wore on, it did not get any easier for Stacy, whose thoughts continued to consist of Joel. The overwhelming, nagging feeling she had that there was something wrong between the two of them only continued to grow. Finally she decided that she needed to see him. She had to talk to him to see once and for all that nothing was wrong.
After indiscreetly prompting Brian to text Dustin and find out where they were, she suggested that they go out. Brian and Lauren turned down the invite, but Ron was more than willing to go. When Stacy and Ron left Brian’s apartment, they headed downtown toward the Dirty Sanchez.
Stacy found herself more and more anxious to reach downtown the closer her and Ron got. As usual, Ron dropped Stacy off in front of the bar so that she would not have to walk and drove off to find a parking spot. Stacy showed her licence to the doorman and traversed the front door. When Stacy walked through the door of the Dirty Sanchez, she immediately caught sight of Joel standing alone by the bar.
He looked so sad standing there by himself. I just wanted to hug him. Then, out of nowhere, a dark-haired girl walked over to him and tapped him on the shoulder. I watched them for a few minutes, waiting for an opening to approach Joel, but it never came. They seemed to hit it off really well.
Then, as I continued to watch them, my heart dropped. It was like he had forgotten that I even existed. Actually, I don’t know why I was thinking that. It’s not like I made myself available to him, or that I was even available in the first place. I guess I just thought...no, never mind; it doesn’t matter now.
Before Ron could walk in, Stacy turned and walked out of the Dirty Sanchez.
“I don’t feel so well,” said Stacy. “Can we go?”
Ron was confused, but seeing as how he was already on thin ice for being late earlier that night, he decided not to press the issue. “Ok,” he said.
On the way home, Stacy was deep in thought.
She doesn’t deserve him. Hmph, what am I saying? Neither do I. Wait, why am I acting like this? It was right then, that I decided that I was going to be happy for Joel. I just wanted him to be happy even if that is something that I could not offer him. He deserves to be happy... even if it makes me miserable. I guess I am just going to have to accept the fact that we are always going to be just friends.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Episode 10: Just Tell Him
What if you loved someone, but you could never tell them how you feel? What if that person was one of your best friends and you saw them everyday? What if you knew that no one else could make you feel the way that person makes you feel? How long do I have to suffer? These are the questions I ask myself everyday. My name is Stacy, and this is my story...
It was an ordinary weekday evening as I sat at work staring at the clock, waiting for it to hit five so I could finally go home. Well first, I would be going to Stratler’s Bar to hang out with my friends for a while. It had become our nightly ritual. I really look forward to it because I get to see Joel.
I know what you are thinking: boyfriend? Nope. Joel and I have been friends since grade school. He is my best friend and I am secretly in love with him. He has no clue though, which is fine because I do not think that he sees me in that light. Besides, I have a boyfriend, his name is Ron. To be completely honest, the flare in our relationship is gone and it is only a matter of time before it ends, but I feel comfortable around him. It is nice to have a sense of security. That is what’s important right?
Stacy sat in her chair at her desk, staring at the clock in agony, trying to will the hands to the five o’clock position. Finally, after what seemed like hours, the thirty minutes passed and she was free to leave. She gathered her things and rushed toward the elevator, where she entered along with several of her co-workers.
When the elevator reached the ground floor, the doors slid open to reveal Ron, who was waiting by the front doors of the building, holding a rose. When Stacy saw Ron, she smiled.
Just when I think the spark is gone from our relationship, he goes and does something sweet like this.
“Aww,” said Stacy, walking up and embracing Ron while still smiling, “how sweet!”
“Just thought I would surprise you,” said Ron. “I figured you would rather me take you home than ride in a smelly cab.”
“Well, you did surprise me,” responded Stacy, before kissing Ron. “And you are right, I would much rather have you take me home.”
“Let’s skip out on Stratler’s tonight,” said Ron. “I am not really in the mood to go there.”
“Not even for a little while?” asked Stacy.
Ron shook his head at the question, then saw the disappointment on Stacy’s face. He gave in, saying, “Well, if you really want to, then we can. It’s just that-“ Ron stopped himself, then hesitated before saying, “Never mind.”
“What is it?” asked Stacy, walking toward the door beside Ron, her arm interlocked with his.
“Well,” said Ron, “To be honest, I am not a big fan of those guys, especially Joel.”
“You know that Joel is my best friend, Ron,” said Stacy, pulling away from him. “Why would you say that?”
“They just rub me the wrong way, especially Joel,” explained Ron. “I just get the feeling that he doesn’t like me.”
“Have you ever put forth any effort?” asked Stacy, exiting the front doors, then turning and walking toward the parking deck beside her building.
“Well, no,” answered Ron.
“Then maybe you shouldn’t judge them until you give them a chance,” said Stacy sternly, as the two of them had reached Ron’s car.
“You are right,” said Ron. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok,” said Stacy, getting in Ron’s car. He followed her lead and the drove off, heading for Stacy’s apartment building.
I hate going to Stratler’s straight from work because I feel so grungy when I get off, so I always head back to my apartment to freshen up. I know what you are thinking and you are partially correct. Joel is one of the reasons why I want to freshen up.
After stopping at Stacy’s apartment long enough for her to change, her and Ron headed for Stratler’s. Upon reaching the small bar, Ron dropped Stacy off in front and found a parking spot not far down the street. Stacy entered Stratler’s and stopped just inside the door. Scanning the bar, Stacy found her friends, focusing on Joel.
Oh no, I’m starting to get nervous, but look at him. Can you blame me? He is so cute. I can’t help but melt when I look into those eyes. Joel is the one person who has always been there for me. We have been best friends since I can remember. If only he felt the same way about me. I wish that I could summon the courage to just tell him how I feel so that I could find out once and for all if he felt the same way.
Stacy smiled warmly and waved at Joel as she started toward him and the rest of her friends. Joel smiled awkwardly, although Stacy did not notice, and waved back. The closer Stacy got to the table, the more nervous she got. I need a drink to calm my nerves. Shortly thereafter, Ron entered behind her and followed her to the table.
“H-hey Stacy,” said Joel, stammering slightly as he stood to embrace Stacy. “How are you?”
“Good, but I will be better once I get a drink in my hand,” replied Stacy, not noticing Joel’s nervousness.
“I know the feeling,” replied Joel, turning his attention to Ron.
Stacy walked past Joel as he spoke to Ron and said hello to the rest of her friends, Jack, Brian, Lauren, and Dustin. After Ron said his hellos, the two of them joined their friends at their table.
For about an hour, we sat around having drinks and talking about our days at work. I was already tired, but I loved the times that we spent together at Stratler’s every night. Not many people can say that they see their best friends everyday. It is one of the things that sets our group apart.
Jack and Dustin had decided to go see a movie and had asked the rest of us to go, but before I could say no and ask Ron to take me home, his beeper went off. I should probably mention that he is an EMT and was on call the night.
“I need to go,” said Ron, standing from his seat. He leaned down and kissed Stacy. “See you later, babe.” Everyone said their goodbyes to Ron, then he left.
“We need to get going too if we are going to be on time for the movie,” said Jack, taking the final sip of his current beer.
“I’m going to have to pass,” said Stacy. “I’m not really in the mood for a movie tonight.”
“Yeah, me either,” said Joel.
Good. I will get Joel to walk me home.
“There’s a shocker,” said Dustin, rolling his eyes at Joel.
I wonder what Dustin meant by that.
Everyone who was going to the movie paid their tabs and left, leaving Stacy and Joel sitting at the table by themselves.
“Walk me home?” asked Stacy of Joel.
“Sure,” responded Joel with a smile.
The two of them finished their drinks, settled their tabs, then left the bar, walking away from downtown.
It was easier for me to open up to Joel than it was anyone else, even my own family. We had a great friendship which allowed us to talk about anything and everything. The more we talked on that night, the more I felt my feelings growing stronger. I have no idea what it was about this particular conversation because it was no different than any other one we had, but the feel of it was different. We seemed to click on this particular night; I felt more connected to him than I ever had before. It was when I realized this that I decided to just tell him how I felt.
As we came closer to my apartment building, I began to grow nervous. There was a weird feeling in the air that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. I started to get the feeling that he knew what I was about to do. I know, I know, I am still with Ron, but like I said previously, the flare is all but gone from our relationship. I have loved Joel pretty much since the day I first met him when we were kids. The time was just never right. However, the feeling of our conversation on this night set the mood perfectly.
When we got back to my apartment, I purposefully stopped at the bottom of the stairs leading up to my building’s front door.
“Thank you for walking me home,” said Stacy, embracing Joel.
“Anytime,” said Joel, unable to keep himself from smiling.
What a gorgeous smile. And look at those eyes; I can’t help but get lost in them.
“What is it?” asked Stacy.
“Nothing,” said Joel. “I am just lucky, that’s all.”
And there was my opening.
“Yeah,” agreed Stacy, “I know what you mean.” Then I panicked. What about our friendship? If I confess to him and he does not feel the same way then it will ruin our friendship. Not only that, but if he does feel the same way and we do date and break-up then that will definitely destroy what we have. Besides, Ron has been good to me. I cannot do that to him either. Before Joel could go any further Stacy quickly blurted out, “Not everyone can have a friendship like ours. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
Joel nodded as Stacy turned and walked up the stairs and entered the code into the keypad to unlock the door. She then opened the door and entered, stopping just inside. She looked back through the window and watched Joel walk away, wishing the circumstances could be different.
It was an ordinary weekday evening as I sat at work staring at the clock, waiting for it to hit five so I could finally go home. Well first, I would be going to Stratler’s Bar to hang out with my friends for a while. It had become our nightly ritual. I really look forward to it because I get to see Joel.
I know what you are thinking: boyfriend? Nope. Joel and I have been friends since grade school. He is my best friend and I am secretly in love with him. He has no clue though, which is fine because I do not think that he sees me in that light. Besides, I have a boyfriend, his name is Ron. To be completely honest, the flare in our relationship is gone and it is only a matter of time before it ends, but I feel comfortable around him. It is nice to have a sense of security. That is what’s important right?
Stacy sat in her chair at her desk, staring at the clock in agony, trying to will the hands to the five o’clock position. Finally, after what seemed like hours, the thirty minutes passed and she was free to leave. She gathered her things and rushed toward the elevator, where she entered along with several of her co-workers.
When the elevator reached the ground floor, the doors slid open to reveal Ron, who was waiting by the front doors of the building, holding a rose. When Stacy saw Ron, she smiled.
Just when I think the spark is gone from our relationship, he goes and does something sweet like this.
“Aww,” said Stacy, walking up and embracing Ron while still smiling, “how sweet!”
“Just thought I would surprise you,” said Ron. “I figured you would rather me take you home than ride in a smelly cab.”
“Well, you did surprise me,” responded Stacy, before kissing Ron. “And you are right, I would much rather have you take me home.”
“Let’s skip out on Stratler’s tonight,” said Ron. “I am not really in the mood to go there.”
“Not even for a little while?” asked Stacy.
Ron shook his head at the question, then saw the disappointment on Stacy’s face. He gave in, saying, “Well, if you really want to, then we can. It’s just that-“ Ron stopped himself, then hesitated before saying, “Never mind.”
“What is it?” asked Stacy, walking toward the door beside Ron, her arm interlocked with his.
“Well,” said Ron, “To be honest, I am not a big fan of those guys, especially Joel.”
“You know that Joel is my best friend, Ron,” said Stacy, pulling away from him. “Why would you say that?”
“They just rub me the wrong way, especially Joel,” explained Ron. “I just get the feeling that he doesn’t like me.”
“Have you ever put forth any effort?” asked Stacy, exiting the front doors, then turning and walking toward the parking deck beside her building.
“Well, no,” answered Ron.
“Then maybe you shouldn’t judge them until you give them a chance,” said Stacy sternly, as the two of them had reached Ron’s car.
“You are right,” said Ron. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok,” said Stacy, getting in Ron’s car. He followed her lead and the drove off, heading for Stacy’s apartment building.
I hate going to Stratler’s straight from work because I feel so grungy when I get off, so I always head back to my apartment to freshen up. I know what you are thinking and you are partially correct. Joel is one of the reasons why I want to freshen up.
After stopping at Stacy’s apartment long enough for her to change, her and Ron headed for Stratler’s. Upon reaching the small bar, Ron dropped Stacy off in front and found a parking spot not far down the street. Stacy entered Stratler’s and stopped just inside the door. Scanning the bar, Stacy found her friends, focusing on Joel.
Oh no, I’m starting to get nervous, but look at him. Can you blame me? He is so cute. I can’t help but melt when I look into those eyes. Joel is the one person who has always been there for me. We have been best friends since I can remember. If only he felt the same way about me. I wish that I could summon the courage to just tell him how I feel so that I could find out once and for all if he felt the same way.
Stacy smiled warmly and waved at Joel as she started toward him and the rest of her friends. Joel smiled awkwardly, although Stacy did not notice, and waved back. The closer Stacy got to the table, the more nervous she got. I need a drink to calm my nerves. Shortly thereafter, Ron entered behind her and followed her to the table.
“H-hey Stacy,” said Joel, stammering slightly as he stood to embrace Stacy. “How are you?”
“Good, but I will be better once I get a drink in my hand,” replied Stacy, not noticing Joel’s nervousness.
“I know the feeling,” replied Joel, turning his attention to Ron.
Stacy walked past Joel as he spoke to Ron and said hello to the rest of her friends, Jack, Brian, Lauren, and Dustin. After Ron said his hellos, the two of them joined their friends at their table.
For about an hour, we sat around having drinks and talking about our days at work. I was already tired, but I loved the times that we spent together at Stratler’s every night. Not many people can say that they see their best friends everyday. It is one of the things that sets our group apart.
Jack and Dustin had decided to go see a movie and had asked the rest of us to go, but before I could say no and ask Ron to take me home, his beeper went off. I should probably mention that he is an EMT and was on call the night.
“I need to go,” said Ron, standing from his seat. He leaned down and kissed Stacy. “See you later, babe.” Everyone said their goodbyes to Ron, then he left.
“We need to get going too if we are going to be on time for the movie,” said Jack, taking the final sip of his current beer.
“I’m going to have to pass,” said Stacy. “I’m not really in the mood for a movie tonight.”
“Yeah, me either,” said Joel.
Good. I will get Joel to walk me home.
“There’s a shocker,” said Dustin, rolling his eyes at Joel.
I wonder what Dustin meant by that.
Everyone who was going to the movie paid their tabs and left, leaving Stacy and Joel sitting at the table by themselves.
“Walk me home?” asked Stacy of Joel.
“Sure,” responded Joel with a smile.
The two of them finished their drinks, settled their tabs, then left the bar, walking away from downtown.
It was easier for me to open up to Joel than it was anyone else, even my own family. We had a great friendship which allowed us to talk about anything and everything. The more we talked on that night, the more I felt my feelings growing stronger. I have no idea what it was about this particular conversation because it was no different than any other one we had, but the feel of it was different. We seemed to click on this particular night; I felt more connected to him than I ever had before. It was when I realized this that I decided to just tell him how I felt.
As we came closer to my apartment building, I began to grow nervous. There was a weird feeling in the air that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. I started to get the feeling that he knew what I was about to do. I know, I know, I am still with Ron, but like I said previously, the flare is all but gone from our relationship. I have loved Joel pretty much since the day I first met him when we were kids. The time was just never right. However, the feeling of our conversation on this night set the mood perfectly.
When we got back to my apartment, I purposefully stopped at the bottom of the stairs leading up to my building’s front door.
“Thank you for walking me home,” said Stacy, embracing Joel.
“Anytime,” said Joel, unable to keep himself from smiling.
What a gorgeous smile. And look at those eyes; I can’t help but get lost in them.
“What is it?” asked Stacy.
“Nothing,” said Joel. “I am just lucky, that’s all.”
And there was my opening.
“Yeah,” agreed Stacy, “I know what you mean.” Then I panicked. What about our friendship? If I confess to him and he does not feel the same way then it will ruin our friendship. Not only that, but if he does feel the same way and we do date and break-up then that will definitely destroy what we have. Besides, Ron has been good to me. I cannot do that to him either. Before Joel could go any further Stacy quickly blurted out, “Not everyone can have a friendship like ours. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
Joel nodded as Stacy turned and walked up the stairs and entered the code into the keypad to unlock the door. She then opened the door and entered, stopping just inside. She looked back through the window and watched Joel walk away, wishing the circumstances could be different.
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